5 Days Before Closing (The time that remains before we walk away from the old house never to see it again)

Our son made it safely to school this morning, I hope. We haven't heard anything to the contrary and since the school hasn't called demanding blood, I'll assume that this is the case. This was his first day driving to school from the new house. It's a longer trip from here so he had to get moving a bit earlier then he's been accustomed. On top of that he spent half the night setting up his computer system. Priorities, don't you know.

All the papers are signed. We're all ready for closing. The new buyers want to walk through the house but HTP is going to take care of that charming little chore. The new buyer, an engineer, and HTP, another engineer, will probably end up talking about the Cat 5 wiring, and everything else electrical. I can stay home and unpack some more so I don't have to stand there and pretend to know what they all are talking about.

After some minor surgery with a wirecutters and a bolt cutter, I "adjusted" the 11" pressure rods for my sidelight window to fit the 10 3/4" opening. I feel so talented. Now we all can walk naked through the house because no-one can really see us from the street. I also installed the pressure rods for those stupid decorative windows that are located on either side of my bed so I could install cafe curtains to cut the glare from the sun shining on my computer screen. Unfortunately, the only cafe curtains available look like they belong in someone's kitchen. At this point I don't care. Eventually I plan to take a stained glass class and replace the kitchenesque cafe curtains with stained glass. Same goes for the sidelight by the front door.

HTP is busy unpacking boxes for and of his office stuff. That'll keep him busy for a while. "Do you have any liguid or something and a rag or paper towels to dust off these shelves?" I drop everything that I'm doing to show him where the paper towels are located right there in front of his nose and where the Pledge is located, right where all the rest of the cleaning stuff is located. This all reminded me, of course about that old email funny about how many women with PMS are needed to screw in a light bulb but I guess HTP has some excuse because we've been in this house for less then a week...BUT THE CLEANING SUPPLIES HAVE ALWAYS BEEN KEPT UNDER THE KITCHEN SINK AND THE PAPER TOWELS ARE ALWAYS SITTING ON THE KITCHEN COUNTER!

*****

Q: How many women with PMS does it take to change a light bulb?

A: One! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out. And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to find the light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CUPBOARD for the past 17 YEARS! But if they did, by some miracle of God, actually find them 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE STUPID LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!! BECAUSE NO ONE EVER CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE A FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS HOUSE!

I'm sorry.... What did you ask me?

Today's Little Bit of Trivia

"It was once wrongly believed that the leopard was a cross between a 'leo' (a lion) and a 'pard' (a white panther) -- hence the name 'leopard'.'" (From Why Do We Say It?, by Nigel Rees)