I had problems with my computer this morning. I don't know why. My internet explorer went nuts. It started generating reams of Website Not Found screens too fast for me to X them out. I couldn't even "legally" shut the stupid thing down. I had to turn off the computer, horror of horrors, manually, and then endure the "Computer was not shut down properly" screen while the computer went through that slow process of checking for errors. Sigh. Have you ever tried to argue with your computer when it chews you out for something you had to do as a last resort? "Yes, but I couldn't help it...I couldn't shut it down the correct way because you wouldn't let me." I also got that wonderful "Outlook Express wasn't shut down properly" sign too. Sigh. Oh well....it wasn't too bad. I'm back up and running again. But I remembered this "funny" and thought I'd pass it on.

Dr. Seuss Explains Why Computers Sometimes Crash

If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port,
and the bus is interrupted at a very last resort,
and the access of the memory makes your floppy disk abort,
then the socket packet pocket has an error to report.

If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
and the double-clicking icon puts Your window in the trash,
and your data is corrupted cause the index doesn't hash,
then your situation's hopeless and your system's gonna crash!!

If the label on the cable on the table at your house,
says the network is connected to the button on your mouse,
But your packets want to tunnel to another protocol,
that's repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall,
and your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss,
so your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse;
then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang,
'cuz sure as I'm a poet, the sucker's gonna hang!

When the copy of your floppy's getting sloppy in the disk,
and the macro code instructions cause unnecessary risk,
then you'll have to flash the memory and you'll want to RAM your ROM.
Quickly turn off the computer and be sure to tell your Mom!

(WELL! That certainly clears things up for ME.)