Word of the Day

Shwacked - Extremely drunk. Obliterated.

Global warming has hit Arizona. The outdoor temperature when I woke up this morning was 38 degrees. Now? 49 degrees. I'm back to wearing jeans and sweaters. I dug my fall themed sweater out of the closet this morning. I can wear it from now until Thanksgiving...at which point I'll switch over to my Christmas themed sweater. I don't have a spring or summer themed sweater...yet. But, if this global warming continues...I'd better keep my eyes open.

I was finally able to take care of getting a medallion signature guarantee yesterday. I'd never even heard of this thing before I was told that I'd need to get one this summer. Apparently, a notary is no longer good enough for some people. All I wanted to do was transfer control of #1 Son's mutual fund to #1 Son. I was a custodian on the account while #1 Son was a minor. #1 Son is no longer a minor. He actually hasn't been a minor for years but for some reason or another, we've never taken the time to do the paperwork required to take me off the account.

It soon became apparent that there was no way in heck that I'd be able to get a medallion signature guarantee at The Lake. The local bank near The Lake had heard of it but they no longer felt it was necessary to provide this service for the very few people in the area that have never needed one before. So...#1 Son and I decided that since we'd waited for years to take care of this little thing, we could wait until HTP and I got back to Arizona where I'd purchased the mutual fund in the first place and where I could get a medallion signature guarantee...because I called to check. took care of the whole thing yesterday. It took lots longer than I expected.

I called the fund people to ask them exactly what I needed to write in my letter that needed this medallion signature guarantee. I actually got to talk to a person! Woohoo! I love talking to real live people. She walked me through the whole process and I was able to compose a really official sounding letter, print it out, and call my local bank to see if they actually had someone on staff who could give me my medallion signature guarantee or if I'd have to visit one of the larger branches of the bank. Simple...right?

I had to find the telephone number for our local bank, the closest bank, here in Arizona. The phone number wasn't in the phone book but, there was a phone number for all the branch offices that weren't listed in the phone book which would be able to help me. I called that number and I go that bleep-bleep-bleep sound and was told that the phone number was no longer in service but I should write down the new number. I called the new number and finally, after jumping through a number of automated phone hoops, got to talk to a person who didn't sound too happy with her job. I asked her what the phone number was for our local branch of the bank. She transferred me to another person. However, I have my doubts as to whether this was a person or not. The entity that I ended up having to talk to sounded a lot like the same computer that they use at NOAA weather service. It was weird. Really weird! I felt like I had fallen through a rabbit hole.

The entity first asked me for my social security number. What?! No!!!!!! I told the entity that there was no way that I was giving it my social security number. Then, the entity asked me for my bank account number. What?! All I wanted was the phone number for the local branch of my bank. What the heck did this entity need with my account number?! The entity asked me which state I was calling from...OMG! I wasn't even talking to an entity that was located in the same country? Thank goodness I didn't give it my social security number or bank account number! I told the entity that I was calling from Arizona. The entity repeated AAAARRRREEEEZONEAWWW. *moan* It then asked me which city I was calling from. I can't even tell you how badly a computer can butcher Chandle er. Thankfully, HTP and I no longer live in Ahwatukee. I was told that there were several branches of the bank in Chandle er. I already knew this. Finally, after some wrangling (I was trying to reason with a disembodied entity), I was able to get a phone number for the local branch of the my bank. I could have driven over there faster....but...I was hoping to save a step in the process of obtaining a medallion signature guarantee.

I wasn't sure whether or not our little branch of the bank actually had someone on staff available to provide a medallion signature guarantee. I figured that there was no point bringing a letter transferring ownership of #1 Son's account to #1 Son to our local branch if I'd have to find a different branch of the same bank elsewhere. Saving gas and time here. Thankfully, I was told that there would be no problem.

Hah! Actually, there wasn't too much of a problem and there wouldn't have been a problem at all if the real person that I talked to on the phone at the local branch of the bank had told me that I would need to bring a statement from #1 Son's account with me. *sigh* Thankfully, I established the account at a branch of this same bank...or they wouldn't be able to help me...even though HTP and I have been banking with them for years. They don't give anyone a medallion signature guarantee...no matter how well they know you.

Oh well...,I eventually got my medallion signature guarantee which...well...it didn't look any more official than a notary guarantee. I was expecting to see a gold seal or something. All I got was green and red ink. But, in the end, I got my medallion signature guarantee and the letter with its medallion signature guarantee is on its way to #1 Son. The ball is now in #1 Son's side of the court. He actually has to fill out all the paperwork to open in a brand new account with these people so they can transfer all the funds to that account. Good luck #1 Son!

Random Thought of the Day

On the other hand, you have different fingers.

Noteworthy Quote of the Day

We've always been here and we'll always be here. We are a specific arrangement of particles and this instant is infinite. Did we luck out, or didn't we? The odds against this sentence having ever being typed, much less the odds against you reading it were inconceivable. Smile, because the fact that you're able to is almost impossible to comprehend.

- Jeffrey Rowland