Home Owner's Associations. HOA's. I have two of them. One for the lake (moat) that surrounds our property in Arizona and one for the common land that encompasses the rest of the property in an around our subdivision in Arizona. Because of our HOA, I don't want to go home to Arizona. I want to stay here in Wisconsin, Land of the Free! I knew that we would be dealing with these people when I bought my property in Arizona but I didn't really have a clue what I was letting myself in for. I pay these people to make sure that certain rules and regulations are followed. This is supposed to make me feel good. They are protecting my property value. Right? Wrong! Instead I'm feeling harassed! I'm feeling hunted! I'm not feeling welcome in my own home. If I take my dog for a walk, there is someone spying on me, just to make sure that I clean up after my dog. I do. I'm a responsible pet owner. I'm not paranoid. They actually follow me as I walk my dog. Not a pleasant experience. There was one weed growing by the side of our house. One weed! It was 2 inches tall. I'm not lying. I sprayed the weed. Not 24 hours after I sprayed the weed I got a notice from the HOA that I was in violation of the HOA rules. I had a weed (which I had already taken care of). They're spying on me! One of my bushes was dying. I dug it out immediately and replaced it with another bush of the same kind, same size. I got a letter from the HOA telling me that I was in violation of the HOA rules. Apparently, I had to ask the HOA landscape committee for approval before I replace a dying bush. Submit a proposal which costs $25. I have another neighbor who got a letter from the HOA telling them that they were in violation of the HOA rules because they had a dying bush in their front yard. I had to get a variance from the landscape committee so I could have a 4 foot wide sidewalk (which came 4 foot wide standard from the builder) leading to my front door. I wanted to add more gravel to my yard to replace that which had deteriorated over the few years that I've lived in our home. According to the rules, I'm not allowed to have gravel dumped in the street and if I have it dumped on my driveway I have exactly one hour to spread the stuff before I get cited....you guessed it....HOA rules. A friend parked their motorhome in my driveway while they visited with us...less then 24 hours later I received a letter in the mail. I was going to be fined $500 if said motorhome was not gone in 24 hours. The motorhome was gone 12 hours before I got the notice. My neighbors and I refer to the letters that come in the mail as "NastyGrams". We speak of the "Lake Gestapo". I've heard some of my neighbors talk about the "Lake Nazi's". These organizations are the organizations that we pay money to so we can be harassed, followed about, spied upon like we were disobedient children. I'm too old for this kind of stuff. I live in a free country. I have rights. I think I'm going to move. Shhh!!!! Don't tell anyone that the HOA's in my neighborhood are a bunch of Nazi's. Who would buy my house if they knew? The HOA who are supposed to be protecting my property value just may drive away any potential buyers who can't park in the street in front of my house. Another HOA rule. No parking allowed on the street.

Today's Little Bit of Trivia

MAFIA is an acronym for Morte Alla Francia Italia Anela. "Death to the French is Italy's Cry." Hmmmm. Apparently the French's lack of popularity isn't a new thing. I wonder if my HOA is being run by the French? I wonder if I should warn them the my husband's people are Italian?