Word of the Day
Nozone Layer: The name of the hole in the ozone layer.
Run Away! I've dealt with many workmen over the years. We've lived in and built many houses. I used to joke that we knew it was time to move because the windows needed to be cleaned. While HTP worked, I dealt with the workmen. I speak two languages and I speak workmen too. That's not a real language but sometimes it seems like it. One of things that one learns right away is that workmen, delivery men, and the like, love to ring your doorbell and then run away. You learn really fast that you have to move fast when that doorbell rings. You also need to make sure that your doorbell works because they rarely knock on the door...even though they will tell you that they bloodied their knuckles doing so. Be prepared. You had better not be doing anything at all when the doorbell rings. As a matter of fact, you should spend the entire morning peering out the window watching for the telltale workmen's van or truck. They usually come equipped with ladders and paint splotches. Even the plumbing trucks. But then again, sometimes they arrive in a rusted out Datsun. Upon spotting this van or truck, run to the front door and make sure your hand is hovering over the door handle. Don't wait for the peel of the doorbell to fade. Rip open that door and call them back. Yes, you should expect that in the nanosecond you delayed in opening that door, they will have attempted an escape. If they succeed in their escape, you will receive an exasperated phone call later in the day, complaining that you weren't home. If they're really serious about escaping, they won't even ring the doorbell. They'll just hang a "Sorry we missed you" sign on your door and run. If you'd been watching for them, they wouldn't get away with this little trick.
As I said, I've had years of experience in dealing with the workmen mentality. I knew that the workmen were coming today to refloat my ceilings. I prepared. HTP and I took down all known breakable objects last night. I got up early. And sure enough, earlier then even I was expecting, the doorbell rang. I dropped the silverware that I was in the process of putting away and ran the door. HTP was still in bed. I answered the door and called the workmen back. Yes, they were already halfway into their truck, ready to leave. As revenge for catching them, the workmen made HTP and me remove all the pictures from the walls and take all my houseplants (I have a ton of these but not as many as my Mom) to another room.
I suspect that today and tomorrow are going to be a bit trying, not to mention the day that yet another crew will be coming to paint the ceilings. HTP is hiding in his office with half our living room furniture. This is his first real experience with workmen since his retirement. I am hiding in the guest room, but I'm still popping up to check on things. You can't just abandon workmen to their own devices. HTP set up the laptop for me. The ceilings in the guestroom and the office are OK. I'm not even going to look at them because if I do, I might have to endure having those refloated.
I'll get up earlier tomorrow morning. Know thy enemy. I'll get up an hour earlier then the workmen got here this morning. Workmen will usually arrive earlier on their second day of work. Just to throw off your schedule.
Murphyism of the Day
Quigley's Law
A car and a truck approaching each other on an otherwise deserted road will meet a the narrow bridge.
Monday, February 28, 2005
Sunday, February 27, 2005
Word of the Day
Nose Plug: Nasal congestion due to a cold or allergies.
HTP made the coffee this morning. The first pot of it. I made the second pot. Anyway, coffee always tastes better if you're not the person who has to drag out the coffee grounds and filter and fill the pot with water. I make really good coffee but I got to sleep in this morning instead, which is even better.
I can't believe that I actually slept until 8 AM this morning. Wow! No. I mean it. When I was younger, BC (Before Children), I used to sleep until 9 AM. When I was even younger then that, BHTP (Before Husband Type Person) and even BUC (Before University Classload), I would sleep in until 11 AM...on the weekends. School of any kind tends to make you get up early. Now, I tend to wake up at 5 AM or even earlier. Leftovers from RB&C (Raising Babies & Children). Now that the children have all grown and left the nest, I just haven't been able to get into the AC (After Children) sleep habit. They say that you don't need too much sleep as you get older. Bull-hockey. Well...maybe I'm just not old enough yet to experience this. I need a full 8 hours still. Mostly, I wake up early out of the RB&C habit. I'm told that it takes longer to develop a habit then it takes to break a habit. Especially if that habit tends to be a good habit. Maybe I'll work on breaking this particular habit.
Murphyism of the Day
McKee's Law
When you're not in a hurry, the traffic light will turn green as soon as your vehicle comes to a complete stop.
Nose Plug: Nasal congestion due to a cold or allergies.
HTP made the coffee this morning. The first pot of it. I made the second pot. Anyway, coffee always tastes better if you're not the person who has to drag out the coffee grounds and filter and fill the pot with water. I make really good coffee but I got to sleep in this morning instead, which is even better.
I can't believe that I actually slept until 8 AM this morning. Wow! No. I mean it. When I was younger, BC (Before Children), I used to sleep until 9 AM. When I was even younger then that, BHTP (Before Husband Type Person) and even BUC (Before University Classload), I would sleep in until 11 AM...on the weekends. School of any kind tends to make you get up early. Now, I tend to wake up at 5 AM or even earlier. Leftovers from RB&C (Raising Babies & Children). Now that the children have all grown and left the nest, I just haven't been able to get into the AC (After Children) sleep habit. They say that you don't need too much sleep as you get older. Bull-hockey. Well...maybe I'm just not old enough yet to experience this. I need a full 8 hours still. Mostly, I wake up early out of the RB&C habit. I'm told that it takes longer to develop a habit then it takes to break a habit. Especially if that habit tends to be a good habit. Maybe I'll work on breaking this particular habit.
Murphyism of the Day
McKee's Law
When you're not in a hurry, the traffic light will turn green as soon as your vehicle comes to a complete stop.
Saturday, February 26, 2005
Word of the Day
Nerb: It's not a noun or an adjective, but something in the middle.
I have to undecorate my house this weekend. I've got a crew coming in to refloat my ceilings on Monday and Tuesday. I was told that I have to pack away all my breakables. Argh! I have a lot of breakables. This is not going to be fun. I've been assured that these guys won't mess up my house. We'll see. They told me that they'd send out a cleaning crew if I'm not happy after the painters finish up. The thing about taking down all the breakables is that I'll have to put them all back. A two-part operation. Taking them down is only half the job.
The doorbell rang this morning. There stood a representative from my builder. He brought me a whole package of brand-new batteries for my smoke detectors, two new filters for my air return and a flat of annual flowers to plant in my yard. All this to thank me for buying a house from them. Wow! Thank you! No...I mean it. I'm not being sarcastic. As builders go, these guys have been really nice and helpful. I suppose I'll have to get busy and plant these flowers. I was going to hold off on flower planting until next fall. I couldn't actually justify buying annual plants that we'd only have a couple of months yet to enjoy. But here I have some. Gifted to me. I can't just let them die. I now have petunias, lobelia, pansy, and some unknown variety of flower to plant. I think the unknown might be snapdragons but I won't know until they blossom and I might have already returned to Wisconsin before that'll happen. At least I'll be able to enjoy the flowers for as long as we remain here in Arizona.
There's a block party scheduled for this afternoon. I'm supposed to bring something to share. HTP doesn't want to go but I think we should. We haven't attended any of the neighborhood gatherings. I'm sure we'll all be complaining about all the rain we've received and the weeds. I'll complain about having to have my ceilings re-floated. I wonder if anyone else has had problems. And then, we'll all be exclaiming about the free flowers we got and the batteries and the airfilters. And then we can escape. How unsocial of us!
Murphyism of the Day
Humphries' Law of Bicycling
The shortest route has the steepest hills.
Nerb: It's not a noun or an adjective, but something in the middle.
I have to undecorate my house this weekend. I've got a crew coming in to refloat my ceilings on Monday and Tuesday. I was told that I have to pack away all my breakables. Argh! I have a lot of breakables. This is not going to be fun. I've been assured that these guys won't mess up my house. We'll see. They told me that they'd send out a cleaning crew if I'm not happy after the painters finish up. The thing about taking down all the breakables is that I'll have to put them all back. A two-part operation. Taking them down is only half the job.
The doorbell rang this morning. There stood a representative from my builder. He brought me a whole package of brand-new batteries for my smoke detectors, two new filters for my air return and a flat of annual flowers to plant in my yard. All this to thank me for buying a house from them. Wow! Thank you! No...I mean it. I'm not being sarcastic. As builders go, these guys have been really nice and helpful. I suppose I'll have to get busy and plant these flowers. I was going to hold off on flower planting until next fall. I couldn't actually justify buying annual plants that we'd only have a couple of months yet to enjoy. But here I have some. Gifted to me. I can't just let them die. I now have petunias, lobelia, pansy, and some unknown variety of flower to plant. I think the unknown might be snapdragons but I won't know until they blossom and I might have already returned to Wisconsin before that'll happen. At least I'll be able to enjoy the flowers for as long as we remain here in Arizona.
There's a block party scheduled for this afternoon. I'm supposed to bring something to share. HTP doesn't want to go but I think we should. We haven't attended any of the neighborhood gatherings. I'm sure we'll all be complaining about all the rain we've received and the weeds. I'll complain about having to have my ceilings re-floated. I wonder if anyone else has had problems. And then, we'll all be exclaiming about the free flowers we got and the batteries and the airfilters. And then we can escape. How unsocial of us!
Murphyism of the Day
Humphries' Law of Bicycling
The shortest route has the steepest hills.
Friday, February 25, 2005
Word of the Day
Meatwave: Cattle Stampede
It's another beautiful day in Arizona. My rain gauge is working. It's chased away all the rain. I asked my folks if they would like me to strap a rain gauge to their car. They're heading back home today. They declined the offer. If they run into rain on their way home, it won't be my fault. I offered.
I can't tell you what the current temperature is outside. Even though I replaced the batteries on my outdoor sensor, it's stopped sensing. I'm sensing that I need to buy a new thermometer. Maybe a nice, non-techie model, like my rain gauge. No batteries required. High-tech devices don't like me. I know that if it ever decides to rain again, my rain gauge will work. No batteries required. Just a long plastic tube. Of course, I'll have to bring it inside when we head to Wisconsin for the summer. Plastics and Arizona just don't get along. Plastics are no match for Arizona's dry summer heat. I'll have to pick out a nice, non-plastic, thermometer with as few moving parts as possible. Maybe one of those ceramic ones, shaped like a smiling sun. Too tacky? OK. I'll think on it. I'm sure I'll find something that will work better then this fancy, schmancy, wireless thermometer that is currently sitting on my desk, refusing to tell me the temperature that the remote sensor is recording outside. Yes. The sensor is working. It's 62°F. I went outside and checked. The outdoor sensor refuses to talk to the indoor monitor. Can't we all just get along?
Murphyism of the Day
Gray's Law For Buses
A bus that has refused to arrive will do so only when the would-be rider has walked to a point so close to the destination that it is no longer worthwhile to board the bus.
Meatwave: Cattle Stampede
It's another beautiful day in Arizona. My rain gauge is working. It's chased away all the rain. I asked my folks if they would like me to strap a rain gauge to their car. They're heading back home today. They declined the offer. If they run into rain on their way home, it won't be my fault. I offered.
I can't tell you what the current temperature is outside. Even though I replaced the batteries on my outdoor sensor, it's stopped sensing. I'm sensing that I need to buy a new thermometer. Maybe a nice, non-techie model, like my rain gauge. No batteries required. High-tech devices don't like me. I know that if it ever decides to rain again, my rain gauge will work. No batteries required. Just a long plastic tube. Of course, I'll have to bring it inside when we head to Wisconsin for the summer. Plastics and Arizona just don't get along. Plastics are no match for Arizona's dry summer heat. I'll have to pick out a nice, non-plastic, thermometer with as few moving parts as possible. Maybe one of those ceramic ones, shaped like a smiling sun. Too tacky? OK. I'll think on it. I'm sure I'll find something that will work better then this fancy, schmancy, wireless thermometer that is currently sitting on my desk, refusing to tell me the temperature that the remote sensor is recording outside. Yes. The sensor is working. It's 62°F. I went outside and checked. The outdoor sensor refuses to talk to the indoor monitor. Can't we all just get along?
Murphyism of the Day
Gray's Law For Buses
A bus that has refused to arrive will do so only when the would-be rider has walked to a point so close to the destination that it is no longer worthwhile to board the bus.
Thursday, February 24, 2005
Word of the Day
Mandals: Sandals for men.
I've got a rain gauge. Still no rain. As a matter of fact, all rain that was scheduled for California has disappeared as well. Interesting. Very interesting.
While the sun shined, my Mother and I attacked my trees. I've been itching to prune my trees but I couldn't do anything with them until the weather warmed up a bit. Mom loves to prune trees. I love to prune trees. Dueling pruning shears flashed in the sun. My trees are all pruned. They look a bit pitiful right now but I know that they'll grow...correctly. I don't like lollipop trees. I'm going for a shade canopy eventually. It'll take a few years before that happens but with careful, yearly pruning, the goal will be reached. Eventually. My Dad filled the roll of Chief Branch Collector and Disposal Agent. He's filled this position in the past. I now have a garbage can full of tree clippings.
Murphyism of the Day
Lemar's Parking Postulate
If you have to park six blocks away, you will find two new parking spaces right in front of the building entrance.
Mandals: Sandals for men.
I've got a rain gauge. Still no rain. As a matter of fact, all rain that was scheduled for California has disappeared as well. Interesting. Very interesting.
While the sun shined, my Mother and I attacked my trees. I've been itching to prune my trees but I couldn't do anything with them until the weather warmed up a bit. Mom loves to prune trees. I love to prune trees. Dueling pruning shears flashed in the sun. My trees are all pruned. They look a bit pitiful right now but I know that they'll grow...correctly. I don't like lollipop trees. I'm going for a shade canopy eventually. It'll take a few years before that happens but with careful, yearly pruning, the goal will be reached. Eventually. My Dad filled the roll of Chief Branch Collector and Disposal Agent. He's filled this position in the past. I now have a garbage can full of tree clippings.
Murphyism of the Day
Lemar's Parking Postulate
If you have to park six blocks away, you will find two new parking spaces right in front of the building entrance.
Word of the Day
Mandals: Sandals for men.
I've got a rain gauge. Still no rain. As a matter of fact, all rain that was scheduled for California has disappeared as well. Interesting. Very interesting.
While the sun shined, my Mother and I attacked my trees. I've been itching to prune my trees but I couldn't do anything with them until the weather warmed up a bit. Mom loves to prune trees. I love to prune trees. Dueling pruning shears flashed in the sun. My trees are all pruned. They look a bit pitiful right now but I know that they'll grow...correctly. I don't like lollipop trees. I'm going for a shade canopy eventually. It'll take a few years before that happens but with careful, yearly pruning, the goal will be reached. Eventually. My Dad filled the roll of Chief Branch Collector and Disposal Agent. He's filled this position in the past. I now have a garbage can full of tree clippings.
Murphyism of the Day
Lemar's Parking Postulate
If you have to park six blocks away, you will find two new parking spaces right in front of the building entrance.
Mandals: Sandals for men.
I've got a rain gauge. Still no rain. As a matter of fact, all rain that was scheduled for California has disappeared as well. Interesting. Very interesting.
While the sun shined, my Mother and I attacked my trees. I've been itching to prune my trees but I couldn't do anything with them until the weather warmed up a bit. Mom loves to prune trees. I love to prune trees. Dueling pruning shears flashed in the sun. My trees are all pruned. They look a bit pitiful right now but I know that they'll grow...correctly. I don't like lollipop trees. I'm going for a shade canopy eventually. It'll take a few years before that happens but with careful, yearly pruning, the goal will be reached. Eventually. My Dad filled the roll of Chief Branch Collector and Disposal Agent. He's filled this position in the past. I now have a garbage can full of tree clippings.
Murphyism of the Day
Lemar's Parking Postulate
If you have to park six blocks away, you will find two new parking spaces right in front of the building entrance.
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
Word of the Day
Lavitate: The art of using the bathroom.
My birthday present came. HTP bought me a rain gauge. I wanted one like I have in Wisconsin. I know that I live in a desert. We don't get much rain here. Usually. This winter we've gotten a lot of rain. That's why I wanted a rain gauge. My rain gauge was delivered yesterday. My father and I quickly removed it from its box and figured out the best place in the yard for its installation. The clouds were thick and threatening. The occasional rumble of thunder could be heard as we installed my new rain gauge next to one of my garden frogs. I quipped, "Let it rain, let it rain, let it rain." The clouds cleared up and we haven't received a drop of rain since the rain gauge installation. We're supposed to get rain tonight. I'm looking out at clear blue skies and sun right now. If I'd known that the installation of a rain gauge would stop the record rains that we've been having, I might have reconsidered my actions. Despite the fact that I'm getting tired of all this rain, I know that we really need it. Oh well. Maybe we'll get rain tonight.
I made prime rib last night for supper. A birthday supper for my youngest daughter. My smoke alarms went off. Repeatedly. The thing with these smoke alarms is that if one goes off, the rest of the smoke alarms in the house go off too...in sympathy. I didn't burn the prime rib. There wasn't any smoke in the house. The house wasn't on fire. My alarms went off anyway. They're really loud. I'm surprised the neighbors didn't call the fire department. After alarms went off for the fourth time, HTP got out a ladder and took down the offending smoke alarm. The one by my kitchen. I repeat. I did not burn anything. There was no smoke. The smell of my prime rib, cooking in the oven, was fabulous. Apparently the fire alarm objected. Maybe it was a vegetarian in a former life. This alarm didn't like it the last time I made prime rib either. I made salt-crusted oven baked potatoes, asparagus and a green salad with supper too. Not diet fare....but good.
Murphyism of the Day
Old Grey Frog's Addendum for Rain
No matter how much rain is predicted, if you install a rain gauge to measure said rain, it will not rain.
Lavitate: The art of using the bathroom.
My birthday present came. HTP bought me a rain gauge. I wanted one like I have in Wisconsin. I know that I live in a desert. We don't get much rain here. Usually. This winter we've gotten a lot of rain. That's why I wanted a rain gauge. My rain gauge was delivered yesterday. My father and I quickly removed it from its box and figured out the best place in the yard for its installation. The clouds were thick and threatening. The occasional rumble of thunder could be heard as we installed my new rain gauge next to one of my garden frogs. I quipped, "Let it rain, let it rain, let it rain." The clouds cleared up and we haven't received a drop of rain since the rain gauge installation. We're supposed to get rain tonight. I'm looking out at clear blue skies and sun right now. If I'd known that the installation of a rain gauge would stop the record rains that we've been having, I might have reconsidered my actions. Despite the fact that I'm getting tired of all this rain, I know that we really need it. Oh well. Maybe we'll get rain tonight.
I made prime rib last night for supper. A birthday supper for my youngest daughter. My smoke alarms went off. Repeatedly. The thing with these smoke alarms is that if one goes off, the rest of the smoke alarms in the house go off too...in sympathy. I didn't burn the prime rib. There wasn't any smoke in the house. The house wasn't on fire. My alarms went off anyway. They're really loud. I'm surprised the neighbors didn't call the fire department. After alarms went off for the fourth time, HTP got out a ladder and took down the offending smoke alarm. The one by my kitchen. I repeat. I did not burn anything. There was no smoke. The smell of my prime rib, cooking in the oven, was fabulous. Apparently the fire alarm objected. Maybe it was a vegetarian in a former life. This alarm didn't like it the last time I made prime rib either. I made salt-crusted oven baked potatoes, asparagus and a green salad with supper too. Not diet fare....but good.
Murphyism of the Day
Old Grey Frog's Addendum for Rain
No matter how much rain is predicted, if you install a rain gauge to measure said rain, it will not rain.
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
Word of the Day
Knee-mail: Praying
It's my youngest daughter's birthday today. Happy Birthday to You! Happy Birthday to You! Happy Birthday Dear Daughter! Happy Birthday to You! She and her husband are going come over later today for a birthday supper. She's a chef. I won't make her cook. Chef's are hard to cook for but I'll do my best.
I have company. My parents are here visiting for a few days. After they got here last night I took them on a tour of our house. They'd never seen it before. It was a short tour. The house isn't all that big.
We had coffee outside on the patio this morning. Nice. The sun was out. Perfect. It's supposed to rain some more tonight so we have to take advantage of any break in the clouds until the rains stop. We live in a desert. This isn't supposed to happen. We aren't supposed to get this much rain. I think my milk cactus has mold on it.
Murphyism of the Day
Phillips' Law
Four-wheel drive just means getting stuck in more inaccessible places.
Knee-mail: Praying
It's my youngest daughter's birthday today. Happy Birthday to You! Happy Birthday to You! Happy Birthday Dear Daughter! Happy Birthday to You! She and her husband are going come over later today for a birthday supper. She's a chef. I won't make her cook. Chef's are hard to cook for but I'll do my best.
I have company. My parents are here visiting for a few days. After they got here last night I took them on a tour of our house. They'd never seen it before. It was a short tour. The house isn't all that big.
We had coffee outside on the patio this morning. Nice. The sun was out. Perfect. It's supposed to rain some more tonight so we have to take advantage of any break in the clouds until the rains stop. We live in a desert. This isn't supposed to happen. We aren't supposed to get this much rain. I think my milk cactus has mold on it.
Murphyism of the Day
Phillips' Law
Four-wheel drive just means getting stuck in more inaccessible places.
Monday, February 21, 2005
Word of the Day
Jocular vein: A humor-sensitive part of the body (near the funny-bone)
I often find myself stating the obvious. I hate doing laundry. I hate ironing. I hate dusting. I hate cleaning. I hate headaches. I hate being sick. I hate pain. I don't have a headache and I'm not sick...I'm just listing the sort of stuff I find myself saying that I need to stop saying. These are "Here's Your Sign" stupid things to say. I don't know many people who actually enjoy doing laundry. My friend who irons everything in her wardrobe, probably doesn't actually enjoy ironing. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt on this. She just likes to wear clothes that have been ironed. Even her jeans. Do you like to dust? Who does? It's just one of those things that have to be done. Like cleaning toilets or washing mirrors. Do I really need to state the obvious and tell everyone that I hate cleaning the bathrooms (even if it's just me talking to me...grumbling under my breath)? I suppose I could be some sort of masochist. I could enjoy pain. I'm not. I try to avoid pain at all costs. Going to the dentist or doctor becomes a exercise in self-control and discipline. I wonder about some people who tattoo and pierce themselves. I mean, when I got my tattoo, it wasn't really a pleasant experience that I'd care to repeat and repeat and repeat. I like my tattoo but I don't think I'll let anyone near me again with a needle gun that looks and sounds like a Dremel tool. So, I need to stop saying these stupid things but I still find myself tripping on my resolve. Especially on laundry days...and when I have to clean the top of the stove. I hate cleaning the kitchen. Oops! Does it count in my favor that I like to cook?
Murphyism of the Day
Athena's Rules of Driving Courtesy
If you allow someone to get in front of you, either:
A) the car in front will be the last one over the railroad crossing, and you will be stuck waiting for a long, slow-moving train; or
B) you both will have the same destination, and the other car will get the last parking space.
Jocular vein: A humor-sensitive part of the body (near the funny-bone)
I often find myself stating the obvious. I hate doing laundry. I hate ironing. I hate dusting. I hate cleaning. I hate headaches. I hate being sick. I hate pain. I don't have a headache and I'm not sick...I'm just listing the sort of stuff I find myself saying that I need to stop saying. These are "Here's Your Sign" stupid things to say. I don't know many people who actually enjoy doing laundry. My friend who irons everything in her wardrobe, probably doesn't actually enjoy ironing. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt on this. She just likes to wear clothes that have been ironed. Even her jeans. Do you like to dust? Who does? It's just one of those things that have to be done. Like cleaning toilets or washing mirrors. Do I really need to state the obvious and tell everyone that I hate cleaning the bathrooms (even if it's just me talking to me...grumbling under my breath)? I suppose I could be some sort of masochist. I could enjoy pain. I'm not. I try to avoid pain at all costs. Going to the dentist or doctor becomes a exercise in self-control and discipline. I wonder about some people who tattoo and pierce themselves. I mean, when I got my tattoo, it wasn't really a pleasant experience that I'd care to repeat and repeat and repeat. I like my tattoo but I don't think I'll let anyone near me again with a needle gun that looks and sounds like a Dremel tool. So, I need to stop saying these stupid things but I still find myself tripping on my resolve. Especially on laundry days...and when I have to clean the top of the stove. I hate cleaning the kitchen. Oops! Does it count in my favor that I like to cook?
Murphyism of the Day
Athena's Rules of Driving Courtesy
If you allow someone to get in front of you, either:
A) the car in front will be the last one over the railroad crossing, and you will be stuck waiting for a long, slow-moving train; or
B) you both will have the same destination, and the other car will get the last parking space.
Sunday, February 20, 2005
Word of the Day
Jeescake: Really bad cheesecake
So I've got swollen sexy lips again. I knew that I had to play for the first two services at church today. I was prepared for that. When I got to church, I found out that I also had to play for the third service. OK. I could do that. I thought it was just supposed to be a practice but it wasn't. I didn't even have the majority of the music for the third service. One of the pieces had six sharps. If you don't know music, that's kind of like being handed an article where you have to look up the meaning of every other word. In this case, the only note on the page that didn't have to be sharped was a B...and I had to stop myself from sharping that. At least I didn't have to play the second part. That music had the infamous double sharp. It was a C sharp...sharp. Which actually makes it a D natural. See what I mean? I had to grab a pencil and do some translation. But I didn't play too badly. I hope. No-one made any comments. But what could they say? This was church. I also had to squeeze in a quick practice between the second service and the third service for a duet I'm supposed to play on Wednesday. Lenten service. No time for more then a quick run through with the pianist and my partner before I ran to the third service and unknown territory. The music director trust me. Sometimes I just wish that she didn't trust me so much...at least when it comes to sight-reading.
Murphyism of the Day
Watson's Law
The reliability of machinery is inversely proportional to the number and significance of any persons watching it.
Jeescake: Really bad cheesecake
So I've got swollen sexy lips again. I knew that I had to play for the first two services at church today. I was prepared for that. When I got to church, I found out that I also had to play for the third service. OK. I could do that. I thought it was just supposed to be a practice but it wasn't. I didn't even have the majority of the music for the third service. One of the pieces had six sharps. If you don't know music, that's kind of like being handed an article where you have to look up the meaning of every other word. In this case, the only note on the page that didn't have to be sharped was a B...and I had to stop myself from sharping that. At least I didn't have to play the second part. That music had the infamous double sharp. It was a C sharp...sharp. Which actually makes it a D natural. See what I mean? I had to grab a pencil and do some translation. But I didn't play too badly. I hope. No-one made any comments. But what could they say? This was church. I also had to squeeze in a quick practice between the second service and the third service for a duet I'm supposed to play on Wednesday. Lenten service. No time for more then a quick run through with the pianist and my partner before I ran to the third service and unknown territory. The music director trust me. Sometimes I just wish that she didn't trust me so much...at least when it comes to sight-reading.
Murphyism of the Day
Watson's Law
The reliability of machinery is inversely proportional to the number and significance of any persons watching it.
Saturday, February 19, 2005
Word of the Day
Gnawty: A teething puppy.
Good Grief! It's raining again. I feel like we're living in Oregon again. Not Arizona. I know. We need the rain. We need the rain. We need the rain. Yup. We need the rain. Pffft. It's all HTP's fault. He sprayed the weeds in the front yard. He must have done a heck of a job of it because it started raining within 3 hours of his doing this(all of the spray has long since been washed away), and it's only stopped for a matter of an hour here and an hour there. Or I suppose if you want to believe the conspiracy theorists, the U.S. government have developed a weather machine and our desert will soon become a tropical paradise. Irregardless, I'm tired of all this wet. I'm the one who has to hike out to the mailbox in the rain, balancing a rarely used umbrella (I had to knock the dust off of it). The mailbox is a couple of wet and sloppy blocks away. I suppose I could drive over there but I just can't bring myself to be that lazy. As always, things could be worse. I could be a golfer. Let it rain, let it rain, let it rain! I don't golf.
Murphyism of the Day
Jenning's Law
The chance of bread falling with the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
Gnawty: A teething puppy.
Good Grief! It's raining again. I feel like we're living in Oregon again. Not Arizona. I know. We need the rain. We need the rain. We need the rain. Yup. We need the rain. Pffft. It's all HTP's fault. He sprayed the weeds in the front yard. He must have done a heck of a job of it because it started raining within 3 hours of his doing this(all of the spray has long since been washed away), and it's only stopped for a matter of an hour here and an hour there. Or I suppose if you want to believe the conspiracy theorists, the U.S. government have developed a weather machine and our desert will soon become a tropical paradise. Irregardless, I'm tired of all this wet. I'm the one who has to hike out to the mailbox in the rain, balancing a rarely used umbrella (I had to knock the dust off of it). The mailbox is a couple of wet and sloppy blocks away. I suppose I could drive over there but I just can't bring myself to be that lazy. As always, things could be worse. I could be a golfer. Let it rain, let it rain, let it rain! I don't golf.
Murphyism of the Day
Jenning's Law
The chance of bread falling with the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
Friday, February 18, 2005
Word of the Day
Fratulence: The tendency of brothers to encourage one another in vulgar behavior.
I think I have a defective gene. This is the gene that controls the part of one's brain when it comes to remembering birthdays and anniversaries and any other important date that would require mailing out a store bought card. My gene is defective. It's not that I don't remember. OK. I do have a problem with remembering the exact date of my own anniversary (the 28th? the 29th?), but other then that, I'm pretty good about remembering most dates. I actually will go out to the store to buy cards. I will take hours, searching the card racks for just the right cards for these important special occasions. I even bought postage stamps with Happy Birthday on them. I buy the cards. And the the defective gene causes me to put the cards on my desk and forget to mail them out. Ahhh!!!! I have a drawer full of store bought cards that have been abandoned for months on the top of my desk and then once remembered, filed in the desk drawer with other abandoned cards. I suppose I could just take one out of the drawer and use one of those but that doesn't seem quite right. So I go out and get a new card and then forget to send that one too so it joins the ranks of the other cards in my desk drawer. I buy stationary too and don't use it. I don't have any idea why this happens so by default, I'll blame it on a mutant gene. I think my youngest daughter has inherited this defective gene. She's worse then me...or better because she actually arrives at the next step. She'll drive around for months with a store bought card sitting on the front seat of her car. Addressed, stamped and ready to put in the blue postal box. She means well. She actually hand-delivered a card to me here in Arizona that she bought and wrote in Florida while she lived there. Talk about snail-mail! She told me that she never could find a blue postal box in Florida. I didn't get that card until she moved back here to Arizona. It's the thought that counts.
I have a friend who remembers everything and everyone. She was my room-mate in college. Maybe she stole my gene and added it to her own. No. She always was the organized one of the two of us. I was the absent-minded professor type. I still am but having three kids forces you out of the fog somewhat. I probably would have starved if she hadn't dragged me out of the fog of studies on a daily basis so we could both go down for breakfast and supper. Back in those days, the dorm cafeteria was open only for set meal times. If you missed those times, you didn't eat. We finally rented a fridge for our room to off-set those times that I would forget to eat. I'd still forget to eat but I'm married to an engineer. He keeps me organized. We don't forget to eat even if we probably should.
Murphyism of the Day
Issawi's Observation on the Consumption of Paper
Each system has its own way of consuming vast amounts of paper: socialist societies fill out large forms in quadruplicate; capitalist societies put up huge posters and wrap every article in four layers of cardboard.
Fratulence: The tendency of brothers to encourage one another in vulgar behavior.
I think I have a defective gene. This is the gene that controls the part of one's brain when it comes to remembering birthdays and anniversaries and any other important date that would require mailing out a store bought card. My gene is defective. It's not that I don't remember. OK. I do have a problem with remembering the exact date of my own anniversary (the 28th? the 29th?), but other then that, I'm pretty good about remembering most dates. I actually will go out to the store to buy cards. I will take hours, searching the card racks for just the right cards for these important special occasions. I even bought postage stamps with Happy Birthday on them. I buy the cards. And the the defective gene causes me to put the cards on my desk and forget to mail them out. Ahhh!!!! I have a drawer full of store bought cards that have been abandoned for months on the top of my desk and then once remembered, filed in the desk drawer with other abandoned cards. I suppose I could just take one out of the drawer and use one of those but that doesn't seem quite right. So I go out and get a new card and then forget to send that one too so it joins the ranks of the other cards in my desk drawer. I buy stationary too and don't use it. I don't have any idea why this happens so by default, I'll blame it on a mutant gene. I think my youngest daughter has inherited this defective gene. She's worse then me...or better because she actually arrives at the next step. She'll drive around for months with a store bought card sitting on the front seat of her car. Addressed, stamped and ready to put in the blue postal box. She means well. She actually hand-delivered a card to me here in Arizona that she bought and wrote in Florida while she lived there. Talk about snail-mail! She told me that she never could find a blue postal box in Florida. I didn't get that card until she moved back here to Arizona. It's the thought that counts.
I have a friend who remembers everything and everyone. She was my room-mate in college. Maybe she stole my gene and added it to her own. No. She always was the organized one of the two of us. I was the absent-minded professor type. I still am but having three kids forces you out of the fog somewhat. I probably would have starved if she hadn't dragged me out of the fog of studies on a daily basis so we could both go down for breakfast and supper. Back in those days, the dorm cafeteria was open only for set meal times. If you missed those times, you didn't eat. We finally rented a fridge for our room to off-set those times that I would forget to eat. I'd still forget to eat but I'm married to an engineer. He keeps me organized. We don't forget to eat even if we probably should.
Murphyism of the Day
Issawi's Observation on the Consumption of Paper
Each system has its own way of consuming vast amounts of paper: socialist societies fill out large forms in quadruplicate; capitalist societies put up huge posters and wrap every article in four layers of cardboard.
Thursday, February 17, 2005
Word of the Day
Etopia: An internet utopia.
Another lazy day in Arizona. It seems like spring. It smells a bit like spring. I think all the rain that we've been getting contributes to this general feeling. It's not spring yet but it feels like it. It must be all the wildflowers growing in the nearby vacant fields. We're supposed to get more rain tonight or tomorrow. I'm amazed at how much rain we've been getting. The people we often call "They", are exclaiming about all the rain we've been getting. "They" actually are claiming that our 10 year drought may be (maybe, if we get a bit more rain) over? Usually, "They" say that the rain we get hasn't made a significant impact on the drought. A mere drop in the bucket, so to speak. But now? Dare we hope? "They" are usually so cautious and pessimistic. Just when some of the HOA's in the Valley of the Sun are talking about zero-scaping (ripping out grass and replacing it with gravel and desert plants), the rain returns. We live in a desert. I always felt planting grass was a bit stupid (after that first year)...at least vast amounts of grass. I do like grass. I like to look at it. I just don't like to maintain it. Lots of water. Lots of mowing. Oh well...I suppose the HOA's will continue on as they always have. I don't have to worry about it anymore.
I don't live in a grassed community anymore. I moved. Now all I have to worry about is making sure the weeds that keep sprouting in my gravel are taken care of. Killed. Ripped out by their roots or poisoned. Evil weeds. Wildflower weed seeds blown in from nearby vacant land. Some of them are kind of pretty but any plant growing where it shouldn't be growing is, by my definition, a weed. HTP sprayed the weeds today. And we all know what this means. It's going to rain so we'll have to spray again and then it'll rain again. And so on, and so on.
Murphyism of the Day
O'Brien's Principle (The $357.73 Theory)
Auditors always reject any expense account with a bottom line divisible by five or ten.
Etopia: An internet utopia.
Another lazy day in Arizona. It seems like spring. It smells a bit like spring. I think all the rain that we've been getting contributes to this general feeling. It's not spring yet but it feels like it. It must be all the wildflowers growing in the nearby vacant fields. We're supposed to get more rain tonight or tomorrow. I'm amazed at how much rain we've been getting. The people we often call "They", are exclaiming about all the rain we've been getting. "They" actually are claiming that our 10 year drought may be (maybe, if we get a bit more rain) over? Usually, "They" say that the rain we get hasn't made a significant impact on the drought. A mere drop in the bucket, so to speak. But now? Dare we hope? "They" are usually so cautious and pessimistic. Just when some of the HOA's in the Valley of the Sun are talking about zero-scaping (ripping out grass and replacing it with gravel and desert plants), the rain returns. We live in a desert. I always felt planting grass was a bit stupid (after that first year)...at least vast amounts of grass. I do like grass. I like to look at it. I just don't like to maintain it. Lots of water. Lots of mowing. Oh well...I suppose the HOA's will continue on as they always have. I don't have to worry about it anymore.
I don't live in a grassed community anymore. I moved. Now all I have to worry about is making sure the weeds that keep sprouting in my gravel are taken care of. Killed. Ripped out by their roots or poisoned. Evil weeds. Wildflower weed seeds blown in from nearby vacant land. Some of them are kind of pretty but any plant growing where it shouldn't be growing is, by my definition, a weed. HTP sprayed the weeds today. And we all know what this means. It's going to rain so we'll have to spray again and then it'll rain again. And so on, and so on.
Murphyism of the Day
O'Brien's Principle (The $357.73 Theory)
Auditors always reject any expense account with a bottom line divisible by five or ten.
Wednesday, February 16, 2005
Word of the Day
Evidents: Damage to your car.
I have to quickly blog! I'm late! I'm late! There's a big white rabbit yelling at me that I'm late! Must blog! Must blog, now!
I spent the day with my youngest daughter. We had a bunch of fun. Bingo. I got a free dauber and game for my birthday...which was yesterday but they give you a day leeway, plus or minus. We daubed and daubed and daubed, but we didn't win. Close, but no bingo for us. But, we did get $5 each when we signed up for our player's cards. Woohoo! Free money. Then it was off to supper and shopping. All day long. I just got back. I can't go to bed until I blog.
Poor HTP had to spend the whole day all by himself. I don't think he minded so maybe it's lucky HTP. At least we didn't drag him off to bingo with us.
Murphyism of the Day
Paulg's Law
In America, it's not how much an item costs, it's how much you save.
Evidents: Damage to your car.
I have to quickly blog! I'm late! I'm late! There's a big white rabbit yelling at me that I'm late! Must blog! Must blog, now!
I spent the day with my youngest daughter. We had a bunch of fun. Bingo. I got a free dauber and game for my birthday...which was yesterday but they give you a day leeway, plus or minus. We daubed and daubed and daubed, but we didn't win. Close, but no bingo for us. But, we did get $5 each when we signed up for our player's cards. Woohoo! Free money. Then it was off to supper and shopping. All day long. I just got back. I can't go to bed until I blog.
Poor HTP had to spend the whole day all by himself. I don't think he minded so maybe it's lucky HTP. At least we didn't drag him off to bingo with us.
Murphyism of the Day
Paulg's Law
In America, it's not how much an item costs, it's how much you save.
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Word of the Day
Dictionarexia: Compulsive dictionary reading for no particular purpose.
Today is my birthday. Another year older. I've decided to adopt a plan that my friend introduced after her fiftieth birthday. She's started to subtract one year on the occasion of each of her birthdays after that year. She's finally found a way to become younger then me. Oh well. Happy 49th Birthday to Me! If I take care of myself, maybe I'll make it back to my toddler years. Hopefully I won't toddle too much.
If you've got a daughter or son in boot camp, anytime you get a phone call with U.S. Gov. on the caller-ID, you tend to panic a bit. My heart was firmly lodged in my throat when I answered the phone this morning. Phew! It was just a Marine Corp recruiter calling to talk to my son. After I explained that #1 son wasn't living here anymore, I started laughing. The guy must have thought I was nuts. I explained about our daughter being at boot camp and he laughed along with me and apologized. Nothing personal, but I'd just as soon not get any U.S. Gov. phone calls.
Murphyism of the Day
Gourd's Axiom
A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.
Dictionarexia: Compulsive dictionary reading for no particular purpose.
Today is my birthday. Another year older. I've decided to adopt a plan that my friend introduced after her fiftieth birthday. She's started to subtract one year on the occasion of each of her birthdays after that year. She's finally found a way to become younger then me. Oh well. Happy 49th Birthday to Me! If I take care of myself, maybe I'll make it back to my toddler years. Hopefully I won't toddle too much.
If you've got a daughter or son in boot camp, anytime you get a phone call with U.S. Gov. on the caller-ID, you tend to panic a bit. My heart was firmly lodged in my throat when I answered the phone this morning. Phew! It was just a Marine Corp recruiter calling to talk to my son. After I explained that #1 son wasn't living here anymore, I started laughing. The guy must have thought I was nuts. I explained about our daughter being at boot camp and he laughed along with me and apologized. Nothing personal, but I'd just as soon not get any U.S. Gov. phone calls.
Murphyism of the Day
Gourd's Axiom
A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.
Word of the Day
Dictionarexia: Compulsive dictionary reading for no particular purpose.
Today is my birthday. Another year older. I've decided to adopt a plan that my friend introduced after her fiftieth birthday. She's started to subtract one year on the occasion of each of her birthdays after that year. She's finally found a way to become younger then me. Oh well. Happy 49th Birthday to Me! If I take care of myself, maybe I'll make it back to my toddler years. Hopefully I won't toddle too much.
If you've got a daughter or son in boot camp, anytime you get a phone call with U.S. Gov. on the caller-ID, you tend to panic a bit. My heart was firmly lodged in my throat when I answered the phone this morning. Phew! It was just a Marine Corp recruiter calling to talk to my son. After I explained that #1 son wasn't living here anymore, I started laughing. The guy must have thought I was nuts. I explained about our daughter being at boot camp and he laughed along with me and apologized. Nothing personal, but I'd just as soon not get any U.S. Gov. phone calls.
Murphyism of the Day
Gourd's Axiom
A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.
Dictionarexia: Compulsive dictionary reading for no particular purpose.
Today is my birthday. Another year older. I've decided to adopt a plan that my friend introduced after her fiftieth birthday. She's started to subtract one year on the occasion of each of her birthdays after that year. She's finally found a way to become younger then me. Oh well. Happy 49th Birthday to Me! If I take care of myself, maybe I'll make it back to my toddler years. Hopefully I won't toddle too much.
If you've got a daughter or son in boot camp, anytime you get a phone call with U.S. Gov. on the caller-ID, you tend to panic a bit. My heart was firmly lodged in my throat when I answered the phone this morning. Phew! It was just a Marine Corp recruiter calling to talk to my son. After I explained that #1 son wasn't living here anymore, I started laughing. The guy must have thought I was nuts. I explained about our daughter being at boot camp and he laughed along with me and apologized. Nothing personal, but I'd just as soon not get any U.S. Gov. phone calls.
Murphyism of the Day
Gourd's Axiom
A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.
Word of the Day
Dictionarexia: Compulsive dictionary reading for no particular purpose.
Today is my birthday. Another year older. I've decided to adopt a plan that my friend introduced after her fiftieth birthday. She's started to subtract one year on the occasion of each of her birthdays after that year. She's finally found a way to become younger then me. Oh well. Happy 49th Birthday to Me! If I take care of myself, maybe I'll make it back to my toddler years. Hopefully I won't toddle too much.
If you've got a daughter or son in boot camp, anytime you get a phone call with U.S. Gov. on the caller-ID, you tend to panic a bit. My heart was firmly lodged in my throat when I answered the phone this morning. Phew! It was just a Marine Corp recruiter calling to talk to my son. After I explained that #1 son wasn't living here anymore, I started laughing. The guy must have thought I was nuts. I explained about our daughter being at boot camp and he laughed along with me and apologized. Nothing personal, but I'd just as soon not get any U.S. Gov. phone calls.
Murphyism of the Day
Gourd's Axiom
A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.
Dictionarexia: Compulsive dictionary reading for no particular purpose.
Today is my birthday. Another year older. I've decided to adopt a plan that my friend introduced after her fiftieth birthday. She's started to subtract one year on the occasion of each of her birthdays after that year. She's finally found a way to become younger then me. Oh well. Happy 49th Birthday to Me! If I take care of myself, maybe I'll make it back to my toddler years. Hopefully I won't toddle too much.
If you've got a daughter or son in boot camp, anytime you get a phone call with U.S. Gov. on the caller-ID, you tend to panic a bit. My heart was firmly lodged in my throat when I answered the phone this morning. Phew! It was just a Marine Corp recruiter calling to talk to my son. After I explained that #1 son wasn't living here anymore, I started laughing. The guy must have thought I was nuts. I explained about our daughter being at boot camp and he laughed along with me and apologized. Nothing personal, but I'd just as soon not get any U.S. Gov. phone calls.
Murphyism of the Day
Gourd's Axiom
A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.
Monday, February 14, 2005
Word of the Day
Deliver: To remove from the table the liver of an animal (such as calf or chicken) eaten as food.
Happy Valentine's Day Everyone! Ah, Valentine's Day. A day to endulge oneself and one's sweety. HTP and I treated ourselves to breakfast at IHOP. Rooty-Tooty Fresh and Fruity was the order of the day. Lots of coffee and I didn't have to cook or brew. MMMM. After breakfast we further indulged ourselves with a drive through scenic mountains.
This can't be a long blog. I'm in the process of baking up some potatoes for supper tonight. Real baked potatoes. Salted and baked. Sour cream. On the side, I'm making t-bone steaks on the grill. When you've been on a low-carb diet for as long as we have, steak becomes a side dish to potatoes. I'm also going to make a salad (more rabbit food...nothing to get excited about). For dessert we're going to really cheat the low-carb diet. Cheesecake! Champagne! I don't plan to diet tomorrow either. Hah! So there! Tomorrow's my birthday so I don't have to diet. But I guess I still have to do the laundry. Oh well...nothing's ever perfect.
Murphyism of the Day
Luposchainsky's Hurry-Up-And-Wait Principle
If you're early, it'll be cancelled.
If you knock yourself out to be on time, you will have to wait.
If you're late, you will be too late.
Deliver: To remove from the table the liver of an animal (such as calf or chicken) eaten as food.
Happy Valentine's Day Everyone! Ah, Valentine's Day. A day to endulge oneself and one's sweety. HTP and I treated ourselves to breakfast at IHOP. Rooty-Tooty Fresh and Fruity was the order of the day. Lots of coffee and I didn't have to cook or brew. MMMM. After breakfast we further indulged ourselves with a drive through scenic mountains.
This can't be a long blog. I'm in the process of baking up some potatoes for supper tonight. Real baked potatoes. Salted and baked. Sour cream. On the side, I'm making t-bone steaks on the grill. When you've been on a low-carb diet for as long as we have, steak becomes a side dish to potatoes. I'm also going to make a salad (more rabbit food...nothing to get excited about). For dessert we're going to really cheat the low-carb diet. Cheesecake! Champagne! I don't plan to diet tomorrow either. Hah! So there! Tomorrow's my birthday so I don't have to diet. But I guess I still have to do the laundry. Oh well...nothing's ever perfect.
Murphyism of the Day
Luposchainsky's Hurry-Up-And-Wait Principle
If you're early, it'll be cancelled.
If you knock yourself out to be on time, you will have to wait.
If you're late, you will be too late.
Sunday, February 13, 2005
Word of the Day
Dashboard: Sprint officials
Sunday. I got up early. I sorted through the music that I should have sorted through as soon as I got it last week. I prepped my music. This means taping and music that has more then two pages, using my three-hole punch so that the music can be put into my music folder, and making sure that my music is in the proper order. While all this was going on, I fed the dogs and reheated a cup of coffee from yesterday's pot and brewed a new pot. I went outside and got the paper. I even had time to watch about 5 minutes of Fox News before I headed out the door.
The drive to the church takes about 30 minutes. It shouldn't take 30 minutes but there is all kinds of road construction between my house and the church. It takes 30 minutes to get from my house to the church. If the road construction is ever concluded successfully, the trip may take 20 minutes. Maybe. I'll have to get up earlier next Sunday, taking into account the 30 minute drive and the fact that I'll have to be there one hour earlier then I had to get there today.
I got to the church on time to find out that our church orchestra had shrunk to something about the size of a small chamber orchestra. Twelve of us? That's OK. We still sounded good. This was a practice but I was told that due to a conflict in schedules, our numbers would not increase by next Sunday when we'll be playing for two services. We'll do our best which isn't all that bad.
After our practice, I drove on back home, stopping just long enough to do some shopping at our local Target Store. Tomorrow is Valentine's Day. Enough said.
Murphyism of the Day
Johnson's Law
If you miss one issue of any magazine, it will be the issue that contained the article, story or installment you were most anxious to read.
Corollary
All of your friends either missed it, lost it or threw it away.
Dashboard: Sprint officials
Sunday. I got up early. I sorted through the music that I should have sorted through as soon as I got it last week. I prepped my music. This means taping and music that has more then two pages, using my three-hole punch so that the music can be put into my music folder, and making sure that my music is in the proper order. While all this was going on, I fed the dogs and reheated a cup of coffee from yesterday's pot and brewed a new pot. I went outside and got the paper. I even had time to watch about 5 minutes of Fox News before I headed out the door.
The drive to the church takes about 30 minutes. It shouldn't take 30 minutes but there is all kinds of road construction between my house and the church. It takes 30 minutes to get from my house to the church. If the road construction is ever concluded successfully, the trip may take 20 minutes. Maybe. I'll have to get up earlier next Sunday, taking into account the 30 minute drive and the fact that I'll have to be there one hour earlier then I had to get there today.
I got to the church on time to find out that our church orchestra had shrunk to something about the size of a small chamber orchestra. Twelve of us? That's OK. We still sounded good. This was a practice but I was told that due to a conflict in schedules, our numbers would not increase by next Sunday when we'll be playing for two services. We'll do our best which isn't all that bad.
After our practice, I drove on back home, stopping just long enough to do some shopping at our local Target Store. Tomorrow is Valentine's Day. Enough said.
Murphyism of the Day
Johnson's Law
If you miss one issue of any magazine, it will be the issue that contained the article, story or installment you were most anxious to read.
Corollary
All of your friends either missed it, lost it or threw it away.
Saturday, February 12, 2005
Word of the Day
Damage: The building of a barrier to block and contain the flow of water
Just because I wrote a huge blog yesterday, don't expect the same on a daily basis. I can't function under that sort of pressure.
Just as HTP and I were cleaning up the breakfast dishes, the doorbell rang. One of our landscaper's hooligans (what he calls them, and he should know) was at the door. He came to look at our patio. Kool-deck (concrete coating) problem review. I'm glad HTP and I decided not to wait for our landscaper to come before we went out the other day. We'd still be waiting. Anyway, the hooligan walked outside and nodded his head several times in agreement. Something must be done with our Kool-deck. He promised to call our landscaper to tell him what his thoughts were as well as mine. I think (please note that his poker face wasn't giving away too much) that he agreed with me that one whole section of the concrete patio will have to be jack-hammered out and replaced. The replaced section will have to age for at least 28 days. And then, they will have to coat the whole deck with a special sealant before they cool-deck the replaced section and re-stain the whole so everything will be the same color. Sounds like fun. Not. In the meantime, it's raining. Lots of rain. Nothing can be done until the rain stops.
Murphyism of the Day
Old Grey Frog's Comments on Maintaining the Proper Water Level in a Fountain
1. If you notice that the water in your fountain is too low and you adjust the water-filler upward, it will rain and you will end up with too much water in the fountain.
2. If you notice that that the water in your fountain is too high and you adjust the waterfiller downward, the weather will be fine and sunny, no rain in sight, and the water will evaporate at such an accelerated rate that you will be forced to adjust the water-filler upward, and then it will rain.
Damage: The building of a barrier to block and contain the flow of water
Just because I wrote a huge blog yesterday, don't expect the same on a daily basis. I can't function under that sort of pressure.
Just as HTP and I were cleaning up the breakfast dishes, the doorbell rang. One of our landscaper's hooligans (what he calls them, and he should know) was at the door. He came to look at our patio. Kool-deck (concrete coating) problem review. I'm glad HTP and I decided not to wait for our landscaper to come before we went out the other day. We'd still be waiting. Anyway, the hooligan walked outside and nodded his head several times in agreement. Something must be done with our Kool-deck. He promised to call our landscaper to tell him what his thoughts were as well as mine. I think (please note that his poker face wasn't giving away too much) that he agreed with me that one whole section of the concrete patio will have to be jack-hammered out and replaced. The replaced section will have to age for at least 28 days. And then, they will have to coat the whole deck with a special sealant before they cool-deck the replaced section and re-stain the whole so everything will be the same color. Sounds like fun. Not. In the meantime, it's raining. Lots of rain. Nothing can be done until the rain stops.
Murphyism of the Day
Old Grey Frog's Comments on Maintaining the Proper Water Level in a Fountain
1. If you notice that the water in your fountain is too low and you adjust the water-filler upward, it will rain and you will end up with too much water in the fountain.
2. If you notice that that the water in your fountain is too high and you adjust the waterfiller downward, the weather will be fine and sunny, no rain in sight, and the water will evaporate at such an accelerated rate that you will be forced to adjust the water-filler upward, and then it will rain.
Friday, February 11, 2005
Word of the Day
Cignature: Burn mark left by a cigarette
Swimming Lessons
When we moved first moved to Arizona, HTP and I decided that it would be really nice to have a swimming pool at our new house. I was a bit nervous about it at first. I had a baby daughter who was only 2 years old and I was pregnant with a second child. I had nightmares about finding one of my children floating in the pool some day. I don't care how closely you watch your children, accidents do happen. I finally agreed to have a pool constructed but only if we fenced it in with a truly child-guard fence. This was before Arizona passed a law which requires child-guard fences for your pool. I picked out a wrought-iron fence with a self-closing and latching gate. The fence had spikes on both the top and the bottom. The fence guy warned me that one of my child might hurt herself on these spikes if she tried to crawl over or under the fence. I told him that I'd rather she scratch herself on the pool fence then drown in the pool. My daughter...none of my kids...ever scratched themselves on that fence. They didn't drown either. Our pool and our pool fence were completed during the winter months. My baby was born in February. I now had two baby daughters.
HTP and I both know how to swim. HTP was an Eagle Scout. I swim, but I'm not fond of it but I do know how to swim. It was a family requirement if you wanted to go out fishing on the dock without a bulky orange life vest. That's another story. Anyway, I don't really like to swim but I know how. Despite the child-guard fence that surrounded our new pool, I was still having nightmares about pool accidents. I did some research. By July, my two daughters were 6 months old and 3 years old. That's awfully young for swim lessons but I found someone who promised that she could teach the youngest child to swim. Swim lessons! Yes!
I drove my two daughters to their first lesson. That first lesson wasn't so bad. Really. In no time at all my daughters were in the pool. It was the second lesson, and the third lesson, and the fourth lesson, that were a bit tough. With my oldest daughter. My youngest daughter loved swimming. She learned to hold her breath really quickly and she would flip over onto her back and float. After the third lesson, she didn't even scream anymore. She would float there smiling contentedly. I would have preferred that she continued to scream because in case of accidents, it would be nice to have some sort of alarm like a child screaming. But that's OK. I'd just have to keep a close eye on her. Swim lessons are not a guarantee against drowning but any little bit to give you an edge.
My oldest daughter, age 3, was a horror. I love her dearly, but she was a horror! You'd think she was possessed. After that first lesson, these daily trips to lessons, were a nightmare. I've never seen so much drama in my whole life. She screamed, she kicked, she scratched, she grabbed onto anything that would prevent her from actually entering water. She'd grab onto the steering wheel so I had a hard time even getting her out of the car! My other daughter would watch this all in wonder. Thankfully, she never adopted these horror fits. Ahhhh!!!! Finally, finally, I would manage to drag her kicking and screaming to her lessons. The teacher even recommended that I go sit out in the car...just in case I was the type of mother who was the actual cause of all this drama. I wasn't but I went and sat in the car anyway. She still screamed and kicked and scratched. She wasn't learning anything. I finally ended up using a parent's last option. Bribery. This is something I rarely used when my children was growing up. I suppose this is why it was so effective every time I did use it.
Bribery. So, after another nightmare lesson, I asked my daughter if she would like an ice cream cone. There was a place that sold ice cream cones for a nickel. Thrifty Drug Store. They don't exist anymore but their ice cream does. I love it. You can buy it at the Water 'N Ice stores. I still go in for the occasional ice cream cone. They cost more but...what the heck. Back to my story, of course she wanted an ice cream cone. After getting our cones, my six month old shared mine, we stood out in the parking lot by the car. It was hot outside and I didn't want melted ice cream drips all over the car. After ice cream cones, we all piled back into the car and headed for home. As we drove home, I asked my daughter if she liked her cone. She did. Very much. I asked her if she would like a cone after the next day's swim class. Yes! Oh, yes! She would. I told her that I'd buy her a cone tomorrow if she didn't "fuss" when it came to swim lessons the next day. She thought about it. She agreed. She promised. The next day we got to swim lessons and she just started to fuss before I reminded her about the promised ice cream cone...and her promise. She quieted immediately. Bravely she walked over to the swim pool and she listened and she had her swim lessons. Every lesson for the rest of that summer, we stopped and got an ice cream cone after lessons. And you know what? She learned how to swim. There were no more scenes.
Now I told you all that because I got a wonderful letter from this same daughter yesterday. You probably all know that she's a recruit, training to become a Marine at Parris Island. Last week they all trained and tested for the combat swim qualification. My daughter told me that she passed her swim qual. She not only passed the Combat Water Survival, Fourth Class (CWS4) she needed in order to become an honest to goodness Marine, she also passed CWS3 and then on to CWS2. Now I have to admit that I would have a hard time passing CWS4. It's very doubtful that I'd pass CWS3 and I know that I wouldn't be able to handle CWS2. There's no way that I would be able to:
(1) Wearing full combat gear minus pack, using one or a combination of survival strokes, travel 50m in deep water, with weapon slung across back (muzzle down).
(2) Wearing full combat gear, perform 25m collar-tow on wounded "victim", dressed identically, while simultaneously towing two packs. Weapons will be slung across the back (muzzle down). Victim will hold on to the two packs and will not assist in propulsion.
Actually, I think she would have passed CWS1, if it had been offered. It wasn't. At least it hadn't been offered as of the letter I received. What a long way she's come from that day when I had to bribe her to go to her swimming lessons without causing a major scene. You've come a long way Baby! I owe her an ice cream cone. Lots of them.
Murphyism of the Day
The Law of the Letter
The best way to inspire fresh thoughts is to seal the letter in its envelope.
Cignature: Burn mark left by a cigarette
Swimming Lessons
When we moved first moved to Arizona, HTP and I decided that it would be really nice to have a swimming pool at our new house. I was a bit nervous about it at first. I had a baby daughter who was only 2 years old and I was pregnant with a second child. I had nightmares about finding one of my children floating in the pool some day. I don't care how closely you watch your children, accidents do happen. I finally agreed to have a pool constructed but only if we fenced it in with a truly child-guard fence. This was before Arizona passed a law which requires child-guard fences for your pool. I picked out a wrought-iron fence with a self-closing and latching gate. The fence had spikes on both the top and the bottom. The fence guy warned me that one of my child might hurt herself on these spikes if she tried to crawl over or under the fence. I told him that I'd rather she scratch herself on the pool fence then drown in the pool. My daughter...none of my kids...ever scratched themselves on that fence. They didn't drown either. Our pool and our pool fence were completed during the winter months. My baby was born in February. I now had two baby daughters.
HTP and I both know how to swim. HTP was an Eagle Scout. I swim, but I'm not fond of it but I do know how to swim. It was a family requirement if you wanted to go out fishing on the dock without a bulky orange life vest. That's another story. Anyway, I don't really like to swim but I know how. Despite the child-guard fence that surrounded our new pool, I was still having nightmares about pool accidents. I did some research. By July, my two daughters were 6 months old and 3 years old. That's awfully young for swim lessons but I found someone who promised that she could teach the youngest child to swim. Swim lessons! Yes!
I drove my two daughters to their first lesson. That first lesson wasn't so bad. Really. In no time at all my daughters were in the pool. It was the second lesson, and the third lesson, and the fourth lesson, that were a bit tough. With my oldest daughter. My youngest daughter loved swimming. She learned to hold her breath really quickly and she would flip over onto her back and float. After the third lesson, she didn't even scream anymore. She would float there smiling contentedly. I would have preferred that she continued to scream because in case of accidents, it would be nice to have some sort of alarm like a child screaming. But that's OK. I'd just have to keep a close eye on her. Swim lessons are not a guarantee against drowning but any little bit to give you an edge.
My oldest daughter, age 3, was a horror. I love her dearly, but she was a horror! You'd think she was possessed. After that first lesson, these daily trips to lessons, were a nightmare. I've never seen so much drama in my whole life. She screamed, she kicked, she scratched, she grabbed onto anything that would prevent her from actually entering water. She'd grab onto the steering wheel so I had a hard time even getting her out of the car! My other daughter would watch this all in wonder. Thankfully, she never adopted these horror fits. Ahhhh!!!! Finally, finally, I would manage to drag her kicking and screaming to her lessons. The teacher even recommended that I go sit out in the car...just in case I was the type of mother who was the actual cause of all this drama. I wasn't but I went and sat in the car anyway. She still screamed and kicked and scratched. She wasn't learning anything. I finally ended up using a parent's last option. Bribery. This is something I rarely used when my children was growing up. I suppose this is why it was so effective every time I did use it.
Bribery. So, after another nightmare lesson, I asked my daughter if she would like an ice cream cone. There was a place that sold ice cream cones for a nickel. Thrifty Drug Store. They don't exist anymore but their ice cream does. I love it. You can buy it at the Water 'N Ice stores. I still go in for the occasional ice cream cone. They cost more but...what the heck. Back to my story, of course she wanted an ice cream cone. After getting our cones, my six month old shared mine, we stood out in the parking lot by the car. It was hot outside and I didn't want melted ice cream drips all over the car. After ice cream cones, we all piled back into the car and headed for home. As we drove home, I asked my daughter if she liked her cone. She did. Very much. I asked her if she would like a cone after the next day's swim class. Yes! Oh, yes! She would. I told her that I'd buy her a cone tomorrow if she didn't "fuss" when it came to swim lessons the next day. She thought about it. She agreed. She promised. The next day we got to swim lessons and she just started to fuss before I reminded her about the promised ice cream cone...and her promise. She quieted immediately. Bravely she walked over to the swim pool and she listened and she had her swim lessons. Every lesson for the rest of that summer, we stopped and got an ice cream cone after lessons. And you know what? She learned how to swim. There were no more scenes.
Now I told you all that because I got a wonderful letter from this same daughter yesterday. You probably all know that she's a recruit, training to become a Marine at Parris Island. Last week they all trained and tested for the combat swim qualification. My daughter told me that she passed her swim qual. She not only passed the Combat Water Survival, Fourth Class (CWS4) she needed in order to become an honest to goodness Marine, she also passed CWS3 and then on to CWS2. Now I have to admit that I would have a hard time passing CWS4. It's very doubtful that I'd pass CWS3 and I know that I wouldn't be able to handle CWS2. There's no way that I would be able to:
(1) Wearing full combat gear minus pack, using one or a combination of survival strokes, travel 50m in deep water, with weapon slung across back (muzzle down).
(2) Wearing full combat gear, perform 25m collar-tow on wounded "victim", dressed identically, while simultaneously towing two packs. Weapons will be slung across the back (muzzle down). Victim will hold on to the two packs and will not assist in propulsion.
Actually, I think she would have passed CWS1, if it had been offered. It wasn't. At least it hadn't been offered as of the letter I received. What a long way she's come from that day when I had to bribe her to go to her swimming lessons without causing a major scene. You've come a long way Baby! I owe her an ice cream cone. Lots of them.
Murphyism of the Day
The Law of the Letter
The best way to inspire fresh thoughts is to seal the letter in its envelope.
Thursday, February 10, 2005
Word of the Day
Chordless: Without musical merit.
Here I sit, waiting for a call from our landscaper. He's supposed to stop by sometime today. I just want to narrow the time frame down a bit. I hate having to sit and wait while I'd rather be out and about. I finished all of the books I bought when I was in Vegas. If I want to read something now, I'll have to re-read some older books. That's fine. I like doing that but I really want to go out with HTP and we can't. Not until the landscaper either comes or calls and tells us when he's going to come.
HTP and I are going to have to do a house inspection. We need to make a list of items that the builder needs to fix before our one year warranty is kaput. Actually, here in Arizona, there is a two year warranty. Not many people know that you have two years. The builders try and keep this little known law as secret as possible. Anyway, we need to walk around the interior and exterior of the house and make a "Fix This" checklist. I've got a mental list but this mental list isn't always accessible due to old-timers' disease, Adult ADD, or just temporary brain farts.
I can hear the bells I hung outside yesterday, clanking in the wind. The wind is picking up. We're supposed to get some rain....sometime in the next few days. I have to find where I put my other windchimes though I'm not sure if I dare hang them all out. The neighbors might start complaining. Actually, the racket those bells are making (just two) might cause a few complaints. Who would guess that two ceramic bells could make so much noise?
As you can tell from the previous three paragraphs, I'm at a loss for something, anything, interesting or funny to write about. Sorry. I'll try and do better tomorrow....or maybe next week. I'm suffering from temporary writer's blochitis. At least I hope it's temporary.
Murphyism of the Day
Laws of Truth in Reporting
1. The closer you are to the facts of a situation, the more obvious are the errors in the news coverage.
2. The farther you are from the facts of a situation, the more you tend to believe news coverage.
Chordless: Without musical merit.
Here I sit, waiting for a call from our landscaper. He's supposed to stop by sometime today. I just want to narrow the time frame down a bit. I hate having to sit and wait while I'd rather be out and about. I finished all of the books I bought when I was in Vegas. If I want to read something now, I'll have to re-read some older books. That's fine. I like doing that but I really want to go out with HTP and we can't. Not until the landscaper either comes or calls and tells us when he's going to come.
HTP and I are going to have to do a house inspection. We need to make a list of items that the builder needs to fix before our one year warranty is kaput. Actually, here in Arizona, there is a two year warranty. Not many people know that you have two years. The builders try and keep this little known law as secret as possible. Anyway, we need to walk around the interior and exterior of the house and make a "Fix This" checklist. I've got a mental list but this mental list isn't always accessible due to old-timers' disease, Adult ADD, or just temporary brain farts.
I can hear the bells I hung outside yesterday, clanking in the wind. The wind is picking up. We're supposed to get some rain....sometime in the next few days. I have to find where I put my other windchimes though I'm not sure if I dare hang them all out. The neighbors might start complaining. Actually, the racket those bells are making (just two) might cause a few complaints. Who would guess that two ceramic bells could make so much noise?
As you can tell from the previous three paragraphs, I'm at a loss for something, anything, interesting or funny to write about. Sorry. I'll try and do better tomorrow....or maybe next week. I'm suffering from temporary writer's blochitis. At least I hope it's temporary.
Murphyism of the Day
Laws of Truth in Reporting
1. The closer you are to the facts of a situation, the more obvious are the errors in the news coverage.
2. The farther you are from the facts of a situation, the more you tend to believe news coverage.
Wednesday, February 09, 2005
Word of the Day
Chessnut: One who thinks of nothing but playing chess.
I found out yesterday that I have an orchestra practice on Sunday. I also found out that I'm playing a clarinet duet this month during a Lenten service. I know all this because my friend, the musical director, stopped by yesterday to drop off the music I'll be needing. Surprise! That's OK. I really do love to play with the church orchestra. Actually, I love any opportunity to play my clarinet. I'm not all that good but where can you find a more forgiving audience then a church congregation? Despite this, I'd better get cracking instead of blogging. I really need to practice this new music. I don't want to test the faith too much.
Murphyism of the Day
Hutchinson's Law
If a situation requires undivided attention, it will occur simultaneously with a compelling distraction.
Chessnut: One who thinks of nothing but playing chess.
I found out yesterday that I have an orchestra practice on Sunday. I also found out that I'm playing a clarinet duet this month during a Lenten service. I know all this because my friend, the musical director, stopped by yesterday to drop off the music I'll be needing. Surprise! That's OK. I really do love to play with the church orchestra. Actually, I love any opportunity to play my clarinet. I'm not all that good but where can you find a more forgiving audience then a church congregation? Despite this, I'd better get cracking instead of blogging. I really need to practice this new music. I don't want to test the faith too much.
Murphyism of the Day
Hutchinson's Law
If a situation requires undivided attention, it will occur simultaneously with a compelling distraction.
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
Word of the Day
Cartilage: The aftermath of a terrible accident
Laundry Day. Laundry is such an interesting subject. Not. At least I don't have to take the clothes down to the river and pound them on the rocks. I don't have to drag out a kettle, set it over the firepit and boil my clothes. I don't have to use a scrub board or a wringer. I've never really had to do this except when I worked as a historical interpreter at Fort Snelling. We scrubbed the white uniforms in a large wooden tub with scrub brushes and lye soap and laid them out on the grass to dry and whiten. I spent the entire summer with red, peeling hands and short, short fingernails. I'd hang out some of my clothes on a clothes line if I could. I love the smell of sheets when I hang them out on a line to dry in the sun but our HOA won't let me have a clothes line. At least I can hang them up to dry in Wisconsin. No HOA.
I don't have to iron anything...my choice. I have friends who iron their underwear. OK. That's an exaggeration. I think. Maybe not. I don't like to iron and avoid it at all costs. I know how to iron. I just don't like it. If HTP needs a white dress shirt, I have to go out with him when he buys it. He always heads right to the 100% cotton shirts. There are wrinkle-resistant dress shirts but you have to hunt for them. They are invariably more expensive but they pay for themselves everytime you launder them and don't have to iron them. Time is money. I don't buy 100% cotton clothes unless we're talking about blue jeans or cotton knit. I don't iron jeans and I don't iron cotton knit shirts. Some people do. These are the same people who iron underwear, towels, and sheets. Not me. I've seen episodes of Martha Stewart where she talks you through ironing sheets and tablecloths. Martha is in jail now. I'm no Martha Stewart. I'm not in jail either.
Murphyism of the Day
Jilly's Law
The worse the haircut, the slower it grows out.
Cartilage: The aftermath of a terrible accident
Laundry Day. Laundry is such an interesting subject. Not. At least I don't have to take the clothes down to the river and pound them on the rocks. I don't have to drag out a kettle, set it over the firepit and boil my clothes. I don't have to use a scrub board or a wringer. I've never really had to do this except when I worked as a historical interpreter at Fort Snelling. We scrubbed the white uniforms in a large wooden tub with scrub brushes and lye soap and laid them out on the grass to dry and whiten. I spent the entire summer with red, peeling hands and short, short fingernails. I'd hang out some of my clothes on a clothes line if I could. I love the smell of sheets when I hang them out on a line to dry in the sun but our HOA won't let me have a clothes line. At least I can hang them up to dry in Wisconsin. No HOA.
I don't have to iron anything...my choice. I have friends who iron their underwear. OK. That's an exaggeration. I think. Maybe not. I don't like to iron and avoid it at all costs. I know how to iron. I just don't like it. If HTP needs a white dress shirt, I have to go out with him when he buys it. He always heads right to the 100% cotton shirts. There are wrinkle-resistant dress shirts but you have to hunt for them. They are invariably more expensive but they pay for themselves everytime you launder them and don't have to iron them. Time is money. I don't buy 100% cotton clothes unless we're talking about blue jeans or cotton knit. I don't iron jeans and I don't iron cotton knit shirts. Some people do. These are the same people who iron underwear, towels, and sheets. Not me. I've seen episodes of Martha Stewart where she talks you through ironing sheets and tablecloths. Martha is in jail now. I'm no Martha Stewart. I'm not in jail either.
Murphyism of the Day
Jilly's Law
The worse the haircut, the slower it grows out.
Monday, February 07, 2005
Word of the Day
Bunion: An onion flavored dinner roll
Life goes on much the same here in Arizona. It's overcast today so I think we'll be getting a bit of rain. Figures. The Orkin guy comes and it rains. There's a Murphyism there somewhere.
As soon as Mr. Orkin leaves, I'm going to head out to drop a couple of letters in the mail. After that, I'm heading to the rec. center to see about signing up for some exercise classes. I can do this. I really want to lose some weight. Diet alone doesn't seem to be doing it. OK. So I haven't been too good on the diet front. All the more reason to fight the war on a new front. A two-pronged tragedy...I mean strategy. My Freudian slip was showing.
Kool-deck update. It's peeling away in one particular section. HTP called the landscaper this morning and we'll see what can be done. I'm just glad we didn't finish paying him as yet. Sometime between now and the time we have to leave for Wisconsin, this Kool-deck (which isn't really Kool-deck) will have to be fixed.
Murphyism of the Day
Tracy's Observation
Good times end too quickly. Bad times go on forever.
Bunion: An onion flavored dinner roll
Life goes on much the same here in Arizona. It's overcast today so I think we'll be getting a bit of rain. Figures. The Orkin guy comes and it rains. There's a Murphyism there somewhere.
As soon as Mr. Orkin leaves, I'm going to head out to drop a couple of letters in the mail. After that, I'm heading to the rec. center to see about signing up for some exercise classes. I can do this. I really want to lose some weight. Diet alone doesn't seem to be doing it. OK. So I haven't been too good on the diet front. All the more reason to fight the war on a new front. A two-pronged tragedy...I mean strategy. My Freudian slip was showing.
Kool-deck update. It's peeling away in one particular section. HTP called the landscaper this morning and we'll see what can be done. I'm just glad we didn't finish paying him as yet. Sometime between now and the time we have to leave for Wisconsin, this Kool-deck (which isn't really Kool-deck) will have to be fixed.
Murphyism of the Day
Tracy's Observation
Good times end too quickly. Bad times go on forever.
Sunday, February 06, 2005
Word of the Day
Pathology: Study of roadmaps
Having drawn a blank when it comes to writing today, I decided to borrow a page from Uncle John's Ahhh-Inspiring Bathroom Reader. I mean I suppose I could have just ambled on about nothing but....
Homer VS. Homer
Homer the Greek
"It is the bold man who every time does his best."
"The charity that is a trifle to us can be precious to others."
"The fates have given mankind a patient soul."
"Nothing in the world is so incontinent as a man's accursed appetite."
"I detest he who hides one thing in his heart and means another."
"The man who acts the least, disrupts the most."
"A sympathetic friend can be quite as dear as a brother."
"Never, never was a wicked man wise."
"How mortals take the gods to task! Yet their afflictions come man, from us."
Homer the Simpson
"I don't know, Marge. Trying is the first step toward failure."
"You gave both dogs away? You know how I feel about giving!"
"Give me some peace of mind or I'll mop the floor with you!"
"Ahh, beer...I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer."
"But, Marge, it takes two people to lie: one to lie, and one to listen."
"It is better to watch things than to do them."
"Television--teacher, mother, secret lover!"
"I am so smart! S-M-R-T, I mean S-M-A-R-T."
"I'm not normally a religious but if you're up there, save me, Superman!"
Murphyism of the Day
Law of Balance
Bad habits will cancel out good ones.
Example: The orange juice and granola you had for breakfast will be canceled out by the large caramel mocha coffee you picked up on the way to work and the candy bar you just bought.
Pathology: Study of roadmaps
Having drawn a blank when it comes to writing today, I decided to borrow a page from Uncle John's Ahhh-Inspiring Bathroom Reader. I mean I suppose I could have just ambled on about nothing but....
Homer VS. Homer
Homer the Greek
"It is the bold man who every time does his best."
"The charity that is a trifle to us can be precious to others."
"The fates have given mankind a patient soul."
"Nothing in the world is so incontinent as a man's accursed appetite."
"I detest he who hides one thing in his heart and means another."
"The man who acts the least, disrupts the most."
"A sympathetic friend can be quite as dear as a brother."
"Never, never was a wicked man wise."
"How mortals take the gods to task! Yet their afflictions come man, from us."
Homer the Simpson
"I don't know, Marge. Trying is the first step toward failure."
"You gave both dogs away? You know how I feel about giving!"
"Give me some peace of mind or I'll mop the floor with you!"
"Ahh, beer...I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer."
"But, Marge, it takes two people to lie: one to lie, and one to listen."
"It is better to watch things than to do them."
"Television--teacher, mother, secret lover!"
"I am so smart! S-M-R-T, I mean S-M-A-R-T."
"I'm not normally a religious but if you're up there, save me, Superman!"
Murphyism of the Day
Law of Balance
Bad habits will cancel out good ones.
Example: The orange juice and granola you had for breakfast will be canceled out by the large caramel mocha coffee you picked up on the way to work and the candy bar you just bought.
Saturday, February 05, 2005
Word of the Day
Liver: A person who lives on and on.
Home again, home again, jiggidy, jog. I went outside this morning to get our newspaper and there was someone jogging down our street. Such dedication. I really need to start on some sort of exercise regime. Maybe on Monday. Right now I've got a book screaming at me from my bedside, demanding to be read. I've already read two of the books that I bought in Vegas. I'm trying my hardest to savor them but it's really difficult when they scream at you like this.
My parents trained my dogs while they looked after them in Vegas. I was actually able to sleep until 8 AM this morning. Wow! Amazing. My folks told me that my dogs were jet-lagged. The dogs demanded to get up at 5 AM that first day when they visited my folks. I didn't think about my habit of getting up a 6 AM and the time difference between Phoenix and Vegas when I dropped the dogs off for their "visit". No dogs allowed at the casino. Sorry Mom and Dad. Next time I'll put them in training for a couple of weeks before we come to visit. It's just so hard for me to sleep so long. Maybe I need to stay up later. Read a few good books. That might work.
Murphyism of the Day
Johnson's Law
When any mechanical contrivance fails, it will do so at the most inconvenient possible time.
Liver: A person who lives on and on.
Home again, home again, jiggidy, jog. I went outside this morning to get our newspaper and there was someone jogging down our street. Such dedication. I really need to start on some sort of exercise regime. Maybe on Monday. Right now I've got a book screaming at me from my bedside, demanding to be read. I've already read two of the books that I bought in Vegas. I'm trying my hardest to savor them but it's really difficult when they scream at you like this.
My parents trained my dogs while they looked after them in Vegas. I was actually able to sleep until 8 AM this morning. Wow! Amazing. My folks told me that my dogs were jet-lagged. The dogs demanded to get up at 5 AM that first day when they visited my folks. I didn't think about my habit of getting up a 6 AM and the time difference between Phoenix and Vegas when I dropped the dogs off for their "visit". No dogs allowed at the casino. Sorry Mom and Dad. Next time I'll put them in training for a couple of weeks before we come to visit. It's just so hard for me to sleep so long. Maybe I need to stay up later. Read a few good books. That might work.
Murphyism of the Day
Johnson's Law
When any mechanical contrivance fails, it will do so at the most inconvenient possible time.
Friday, February 04, 2005
Word of the Day
Handkerchief: Cold storage
We're back! HTP and I finished up our Vegas trip on a high note...yup, I got another Royal Flush. Yeah! There wasn't enough Dam to traffic to mention. As a matter of fact, the traffic all round was very light on our return to our Arizona home. Well...we did hit rush hour traffic but since there were two of us we got to drive in the diamond lane. Carpool. We carpooled back from Vegas.
There was a whole mailbox of mail waiting for us when we got home (mainly bills, a couple of absentee ballots for an upcoming election in Wisconsin, some sales catalogs and....). Our luck continues. We got a letter from our daughter from boot camp. Our first letter. She's learning all about how to beat up on the bad guys and play with guns and use gas masks. It may take her a bit longer to graduate then she'd originally hoped. I don't know. She wrote this letter a week ago so maybe (I hope, I hope) she's much improved. She's been wounded in action. Achilles tendonitis. Crutches and light duty. Sounds like there's a lot of wounded soon-to-be soldiers at camp. This stuff happens or there wouldn't be a need for an FRP (female rehabilitation platoon) with doctors and physical therapists.
So anyway, I thought it might be interesting for you all to read a bit about Achilles since my daughter seems to be having so much trouble with his namesake tendons. Achilles was the son of Peleus, king of the Myrmidons in Phthia (SE Thessaly), and the sea nymph Thetis. Zeus and Poseidon had vied for her hand until an oracle revealed she would bear a son greater than his father, whence they wisely chose to give her to someone else. According to legend, Thetis had tried to make Achilles invincible by dipping him in the river Styx, but forgot to wet the heel she held him by, leaving him vulnerable so he could be killed by a blow to that heel. (So came about the famed Achilles' tendon.) Homer (really famous author of epic proportion), however, deliberately makes no mention of this; Achilles cannot be a hero if he is not at risk. Homer, however, does mention his being wounded, although not seriously, in the Illiad. There's more but did you really want to even know this much?
Murphyism of the Day
Paul's Law
You can't fall off the floor.
Handkerchief: Cold storage
We're back! HTP and I finished up our Vegas trip on a high note...yup, I got another Royal Flush. Yeah! There wasn't enough Dam to traffic to mention. As a matter of fact, the traffic all round was very light on our return to our Arizona home. Well...we did hit rush hour traffic but since there were two of us we got to drive in the diamond lane. Carpool. We carpooled back from Vegas.
There was a whole mailbox of mail waiting for us when we got home (mainly bills, a couple of absentee ballots for an upcoming election in Wisconsin, some sales catalogs and....). Our luck continues. We got a letter from our daughter from boot camp. Our first letter. She's learning all about how to beat up on the bad guys and play with guns and use gas masks. It may take her a bit longer to graduate then she'd originally hoped. I don't know. She wrote this letter a week ago so maybe (I hope, I hope) she's much improved. She's been wounded in action. Achilles tendonitis. Crutches and light duty. Sounds like there's a lot of wounded soon-to-be soldiers at camp. This stuff happens or there wouldn't be a need for an FRP (female rehabilitation platoon) with doctors and physical therapists.
So anyway, I thought it might be interesting for you all to read a bit about Achilles since my daughter seems to be having so much trouble with his namesake tendons. Achilles was the son of Peleus, king of the Myrmidons in Phthia (SE Thessaly), and the sea nymph Thetis. Zeus and Poseidon had vied for her hand until an oracle revealed she would bear a son greater than his father, whence they wisely chose to give her to someone else. According to legend, Thetis had tried to make Achilles invincible by dipping him in the river Styx, but forgot to wet the heel she held him by, leaving him vulnerable so he could be killed by a blow to that heel. (So came about the famed Achilles' tendon.) Homer (really famous author of epic proportion), however, deliberately makes no mention of this; Achilles cannot be a hero if he is not at risk. Homer, however, does mention his being wounded, although not seriously, in the Illiad. There's more but did you really want to even know this much?
Murphyism of the Day
Paul's Law
You can't fall off the floor.
Thursday, February 03, 2005
Word of the Day
Carpal: People who drive to work together.
There is just so much gambling that one can do during one trip to Vegas before one can't stand it any longer. HTP and I love coming to Vegas. We don't spend our entire time gambling. We eat. We drink. We visit with my folks. We people watch. Today I've got plans to spend a few hours getting my back "treated" at the spa. They're going to "treat" my face (facial) too. And then...they're going to remove any nasty split-ends that may have reared their ugly heads since I got my hair cut last. It's been a while. Nope. I don't spend every waking moment of my time here in Vegas plunking money into some machine. There are other things to do with my time. After I get this blogged, I think I'll wander down and have a cup of latte in the park.
Murphyism of the Day
Laws of Annoyance
When working on a project, if you put away a tool that you're certain that you're finished with, you will need it instantly.
Carpal: People who drive to work together.
There is just so much gambling that one can do during one trip to Vegas before one can't stand it any longer. HTP and I love coming to Vegas. We don't spend our entire time gambling. We eat. We drink. We visit with my folks. We people watch. Today I've got plans to spend a few hours getting my back "treated" at the spa. They're going to "treat" my face (facial) too. And then...they're going to remove any nasty split-ends that may have reared their ugly heads since I got my hair cut last. It's been a while. Nope. I don't spend every waking moment of my time here in Vegas plunking money into some machine. There are other things to do with my time. After I get this blogged, I think I'll wander down and have a cup of latte in the park.
Murphyism of the Day
Laws of Annoyance
When working on a project, if you put away a tool that you're certain that you're finished with, you will need it instantly.
Wednesday, February 02, 2005
Word of the Day
Cardiac: Someone crazy about cars
HTP and I had supper last night at one of the casino restaurants. Billy Bob's. I know I've never actually had a good meal there but I keep on trying. What keeps drawing me back are the raw oysters and the Shiner Bock beer. I decided to be adventurous last night. They had grilled ahi tuna on the menu as a special. I asked them if I could order my ahi tuna rare and the answer came back from the chef that the tuna was sushi grade and that I could have my tuna rare. OK. It came to me on a plate, 1/4" thick, grilled overdone on the outside and pink on the inside. Rare. I think the poor chef must have taken this guppy right out of the freezer in order for him to be able to grill my tuna rare. I'm glad I asked for some wasabi too. I think the sushi grade ahi tuna was a bit past its prime. A generous smear of wasabi helped mask this condition but it still tasted and smelled...fishy. I know. It's fish. Fish are fishy, right? Nope. Good fish is never "fishy". Bad fish is "fishy". I ate half of my ahi tuna and then decided that I didn't want to risk eating more...just in case. I didn't go hungry. I'd already eaten a dozen raw oysters and downed a tankard of Shiner Bock. I also ate half of a spinach salad. The spinach salad was good but I wish the dressing had been edible. Why they can't seem to make a warm bacon dressing in the Billy Bob kitchens, I have no idea. I'm thinking that it's because the bacon that they use in the salad must come from some huge Sysco bag and they don't have anything remotely resembling actual bacon in the kitchen from which to harvest the necessary bacon drippings for good bacon dressing. I almost asked for a dish of some other dressing because what they sent me tasted a bit like brown sugar dissolved in water. Oh well, tonight we'll scoot over to Billy Bob's again, just for the raw oysters as an appetizer before we'll eat supper at Willy and Jose's tonight.
Murphyism of the Day
Law of Selective Gravity
An object will fall so as to do the most damage.
Cardiac: Someone crazy about cars
HTP and I had supper last night at one of the casino restaurants. Billy Bob's. I know I've never actually had a good meal there but I keep on trying. What keeps drawing me back are the raw oysters and the Shiner Bock beer. I decided to be adventurous last night. They had grilled ahi tuna on the menu as a special. I asked them if I could order my ahi tuna rare and the answer came back from the chef that the tuna was sushi grade and that I could have my tuna rare. OK. It came to me on a plate, 1/4" thick, grilled overdone on the outside and pink on the inside. Rare. I think the poor chef must have taken this guppy right out of the freezer in order for him to be able to grill my tuna rare. I'm glad I asked for some wasabi too. I think the sushi grade ahi tuna was a bit past its prime. A generous smear of wasabi helped mask this condition but it still tasted and smelled...fishy. I know. It's fish. Fish are fishy, right? Nope. Good fish is never "fishy". Bad fish is "fishy". I ate half of my ahi tuna and then decided that I didn't want to risk eating more...just in case. I didn't go hungry. I'd already eaten a dozen raw oysters and downed a tankard of Shiner Bock. I also ate half of a spinach salad. The spinach salad was good but I wish the dressing had been edible. Why they can't seem to make a warm bacon dressing in the Billy Bob kitchens, I have no idea. I'm thinking that it's because the bacon that they use in the salad must come from some huge Sysco bag and they don't have anything remotely resembling actual bacon in the kitchen from which to harvest the necessary bacon drippings for good bacon dressing. I almost asked for a dish of some other dressing because what they sent me tasted a bit like brown sugar dissolved in water. Oh well, tonight we'll scoot over to Billy Bob's again, just for the raw oysters as an appetizer before we'll eat supper at Willy and Jose's tonight.
Murphyism of the Day
Law of Selective Gravity
An object will fall so as to do the most damage.
Tuesday, February 01, 2005
Word of the Day
Cannibal: Someone who is fed up with people.
I'm blogging from Las Vegas for the next few days. HTP and I decided to make a mad dash for the border. The border that runs between Arizona and Nevada. We left our Arizona home before breakfast, stopping only to fill our travel mugs with homebrewed coffee. It took us a full hour to cross the Phoenix city proper, before we had free-sailing on the Carefree Highway. Really. It was free-sailing. Even when we hit the police checkpoint that guards the Hoover Dam, the traffic was miraculous. And guess what? There wasn't any Dam traffic today either. I had to watch my speedometer closely or I would have exceeded the mandatory Dam 15mph. Let's hope the traffic remains as light on our return trip.
Murphyism of the Day
Law of the Preversity of Nature
You cannot successfully determine beforehand which side of the bread to butter.
Cannibal: Someone who is fed up with people.
I'm blogging from Las Vegas for the next few days. HTP and I decided to make a mad dash for the border. The border that runs between Arizona and Nevada. We left our Arizona home before breakfast, stopping only to fill our travel mugs with homebrewed coffee. It took us a full hour to cross the Phoenix city proper, before we had free-sailing on the Carefree Highway. Really. It was free-sailing. Even when we hit the police checkpoint that guards the Hoover Dam, the traffic was miraculous. And guess what? There wasn't any Dam traffic today either. I had to watch my speedometer closely or I would have exceeded the mandatory Dam 15mph. Let's hope the traffic remains as light on our return trip.
Murphyism of the Day
Law of the Preversity of Nature
You cannot successfully determine beforehand which side of the bread to butter.