Word of the Day

Joblett - A less than part-time job, say 10 hours a week.

Cold/Flu - Day 4

All the king's men and all the king's horses....

Substitute all my attempts at over-the-counter meds for men and horses and you should know that I've still got a cold/flu and I'm still coughing and coughing and coughing and...you get the idea. Will I be better tomorrow? Stay tuned.

In the meantime, let's see if we can find some humor to provide what some claim is the best medicine.

Senior Laughter

I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising. I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over.
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Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked.
She simply replied, "No peer pressure."
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The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs. (Love this one!!)
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Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, "How old was your husband?"
"98," she replied. "Two years older than me."
"So you're 96," the undertaker commented.
She responded, "Hardly worth going home, is it?"
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I've sure gotten old. I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement,new knees. Fought prostate cancer and diabetes. I'm half blind, can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation, hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends. But, thank God, I still have my driver's license!
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An elderly woman from Brooklyn decided to prepare her will and make her final requests. She told her rabbi she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered over Bloomingdales.
"Bloomingdales?" the rabbi exclaimed. "Why Bloomingdales?"
"Then I'll be sure my daughters visit me twice a week."

Murphyism of the Day

Nichol's Fourth Law

Avoid any action with an unacceptable outcome.