Fifteen Days and a Wake Up Before We Leave For Wisconsin

Word of the Day

Abstractional-dopmology: The study of brown dots on any carpet.

I'm going to go and get my eyes checked today. My glasses probably need replacing and no-one will give me new contact lenses without a current prescription. My prescription is over a year old and they won't honor it. My glasses are over two years old and I can't see very well driving with after dark.

We all know that I'm not very fond of going to doctors. Anyone with a Dr. in front of their name is suspect. Eye doctors aren't too bad. But...I really hate that puffer machine where they blow air into your eye. I flinch every single time. I jump too. They actually hate me because I'll flinch before the air puffs and then they have to do it over and over and over and over. Sorry guys. I don't like anyone but me touching my eyes and the puffer machine falls into that category. They've got another thing that they touch to your eye and I wish they'd just let me do it.

And then you have to go through this huge multiple choice test. So many questions. So many decisions. Which one looks better? Is this one better or that one? And sometimes they look just the same and they won't stop asking until you give them an answer. Where's the shiny red light now? Look up, look down. Look right at the bright light that I'm going to blind you with.

Everytime we go to the eye doctor, they insist on putting drops in your eyes and you come out of the doctor's office looking like you're high on drugs because your pupils are so big it's hard to tell what color your eyes are anymore. After you're finally allowed to leave, you walk outside and Ahhh! THE SUN!!!! Even if they give you these funky sunglasses, they never fit right over your glasses and the SUN slips through along the edges to blind you. I know I'll have to wear my glasses because after these drops are put in my eyes my contacts won't go back in. Anyway, I just hope HTP and I don't get stopped by any police officers as we drive back home. I don't want to have to fight a DUI....not that I've ever had a problem with that but...what can I say...I'm a bit paranoid.

Murphyism of the Day

Parkinson's Axioms

1. An official wants to multiply subordinates, not rivals.

2. Officials make work for each other.