Word of the Day

Deafecation - Teacher's response to one too many kindergartner's hand-raisings.

All right, if I had anything worthwhile to say it would have been said already. Nothing. The weather has been great! I picked another pan of green beans. If I'm not careful, the zucchini will get away from me. I did not go out and pick berries.

Pout. I suppose I can't write a blog and just leave it with a mere paragraph. OK. I'll mine my "funnies". Will that satisfy?

$10,000 Per Call

A writer decided to write a book about the many churches and chapels found on military installations. He bought a plane ticket to Fort Jackson, SC. thinking he would start by working his way across the USA. On his first day he was inside the Base Chapel taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall above a sign that read "$10,000 per call." The man, being intrigued, asked a soldier who was passing by what the telephone was used for. The soldier replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God. The man thanked him and went on his way.

Next, he stopped at Andrews Air Force Base in Washington, DC. There, at a very large Chapel, he saw the same golden telephone with the same sign under it. He asked a nearby Airman what this phone's purpose was. She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 he could talk to God. "O.K., thank you," said the man, and left.

He then traveled to Ft. Hood, TX , Wright Patterson AFB, OH, the Naval Academy in Annapolis, MD, and Naval Air Station Oceana, VA. In every chapel he saw the same golden telephone with the same "$10,000 per call" sign under it!

He decided to travel to a Marine base to see if he would find the same phone. He arrived aboard Camp Pendleton, CA and while waiting to visit the base chapel, he was invited into the Enlisted Mess. There was the same golden telephone! This time, however, the sign under it read "40 cents per call." The man was surprised. Just then a Gunnery Sergeant walked in and he asked about the sign. "Gunny, I've traveled all over America and I've seen this same golden telephone in many chapels on many different military installations. I'm told that it's a direct line to Heaven, but in the Army, the Air Force and even the Navy the price was $10,000 per call. Why is it so cheap here?" The Gunny smiled and answered, "You're on a Marine base now sir. It's just a local call."

Murphyism of the Day

Herblock's Law

If it's good, they discontinue it.